DIRECTIONS to a HAPPY LIFE ANSWERS to LIFE MINUTES of WISDOM
Larry Delrose
Copyright 2011 Larry Delrose
All rights reserved.
Smashwords Edition
TABLE OF CONTENTS
INTRODUCTION: IS ANYONE IN THIS WORLD HAPPY?
YOUR LIFE IS BETTER THAN THE RICH & FAMOUS
DUE DILIGENCE ON BIG DECISIONS
HOW TO TEACH KIDS THE VALUE OF MONEY
THE MONEY GAME CAN BURN YOU OUT
LEARN TO MANAGE YOUR OWN MONEY
MORE TO CHILDHOOD SPORTS THAN WINNING
WORKING IN THE YARD AND GARDEN
MEETING PEOPLE YOU WANT TO IMPRESS
FRANK SINATRA, DEAN MARTIN AND SAMMY DAVIS JR.
OPRAH, ME AND THE SCREEN ACTORS’ GUILD
THE MOST INTERESTING PERSON IN THE UNITED STATES
HELP SOMEONE WITH THEIR CAREER
GET RID OF THE BLUES AND FEEL PATRIOTIC
I WILL HAVE JUST ENOUGH MONEY LEFT TO BURY ME
EVERYTHING CAN BE DESCRIBED BY MONEY
PREFACE
The idea of calling the book “Directions To A Happy Life” came from the comparison with getting a computer and when you bring it home there are the “directions” for setting it up. Lot’s of things come with directions, but life doesn’t. So, since life doesn’t come with directions or a manual I have created “The Directions To A Happy Life”. Kind of like “Life Answers for Dummies.” Or like a “GPS System for Living Life.”
Yes, I know this is a quirky reference book. But after reading books written on happiness and contentment I found they were either written by medical doctors or psychiatrists, that most people never could understand. Or by religious people preaching their particular faiths ideas. It became apparent to me that there was a need for a reference book that gives the answers to life and lays everything out quick and simple—that wasn’t religious or too stuffy. So the only solution was to develop my own philosophy and techniques based on my own 40 years of personal research.
After writing it I realized another title for this book could have been “The Boy From Joliet Who Wrote Things Down For 40 Years.”
I hope this book will make you think about your life differently. I like to say this book is “Self Help Entertainment.”
SMELLING THE ROSES
What does “Smelling the Roses” mean? It means you experience and enjoy the most simple and important things in life that 99% of other people miss or forget about. In this book you will learn how to be of that 1%. You also will learn how to create joy and entertainment out of your own life so you don’t need to keep searching for that something that you supposedly think will make you happy. You have that thing already you just don’t realize it yet. You will learn to understand that fame and fortune is not as much fun as you think it is. You will come to find out that you have a great life and learn to live life to the fullest without making many mistakes along the way. It’s all here, the answers to all the stages of life. Life answers are in this book. The answers came from 40 years of my research by observing the happiest and most content people who ever lived. They left these answers and secrets behind for us to use. Some names will be revealed and some will remain anonymous. Everyone needs this wisdom no matter how hip and smart you are. This book is not political or religious it’s just old-fashioned wisdom and common sense about every subject in life. It’s not a book of data or medical facts. It’s observing what people did in their lives that works.
Eliminate the stress and fatigue life brings.
Believe it or not the decisions to life are really easy.
This is your lucky day. You found this book.
The person who makes the fewest mistakes and has the least amount of baggage has the easiest ride in life.
So come “Smell the Roses” with the Delroses.
FOREWORD
By MEL HABER
There are hundreds of "self help" books currently on the market. They cover every subject from raising children to being happily married and every possible situation in between. I have known Larry Delrose for over 20 years and have consulted him many times for his perspective on various elements of life. His clear understanding and ability to see through the proverbial forest to the trees has been truly amazing. Larry has a unique ability to get right to the heart of the issue. He makes sense out of nonsense.
Many friends and acquaintances have urged Larry to write down his thoughts about life's many questions. He finally has done that. "Directions To A Happy Life" can fix the boredom and unhappiness that most people experience in their everyday life. The book covers over 100 different areas of life. Good old fashioned wisdom in an easy to read simple format guaranteed to improve every readers life. I strongly recommend this book.
It is a must read for young, old, rich, poor and famous. If you are looking for a happier and simpler life this book is for you. Guaranteed to save the cost of a psychiatrist.
INTRODUCTION
IS
ANYONE IN THIS WORLD HAPPY?
I was reading a book recently and the author told a story about how they were at a dinner party one night. After dinner someone suggested a game. Every couple had to write down the names of 12 people they knew that were truly happy. They passed out pens and paper and no one could come up with more than one or two names of people they felt were really happy or content. When I read this story I knew I had to finally write this book. Everyone I knew when I was growing up seemed happy and content. So let me tell you the story.
Once upon a time there was a kid named Larry Delrose. He lived on the right side of town, had great parents, a fantastic brother and great friends. He played in the neighborhood, went to interesting schools, but was by no means rich. He knew lots of old time Italian people who seemed to always be happy, content and grateful for their lives. So he was always happy and content. You may ask, is this a story of a dream? No, it’s really true.
For the next 200 pages I am going to take you on a old fashion “love in” a “love in” about life and how good it can be if you just follow the “Directions”. The “Directions To A Happy Life”.
Hopefully I will cure your boredom, your stress and your fatigue that unfortunately most people have living their lives these days. Get ready for a fabulous journey.
DEBT
Everyone in the beginning of their adult life unfortunately needs to venture into debt, unless you were born rich—and that’s no guarantee of anything either. We need life’s basic needs—a house, a car, furniture, television, computer and clothes. These things shape who we are as a person and thus they are extremely important to our lives. Our home acts as the principal environment from where we will raise our families, create memories, and take on the world. If you make good decisions initially on these important items, you will be able to enjoy life more and you will definitely be happier and more content. If you don’t make these decisions properly you will have stress, unhappiness and aggravation your entire life. Here are the answers to life’s biggest buying and credit decisions.
1) Buy a smaller less expensive house. A house you can afford but in a top neighborhood of the city you live in. People usually pick houses that are too big and too expensive and only live in a few rooms don’t make that mistake. Just make sure it is in the best neighborhood, because if you’re happy with the neighborhood this will prevent you from having the urge to move frequently. But the biggest secret in this chapter is you must get a 15 year mortgage not a 25 or 30 year. The difference in the payment is approximately $200 per month more for every $100,000 borrowed. This will be one of the best money decisions you will ever make. The 15 year mortgage is the biggest secret in the world of credit. It is a must!
2) Make good decisions every time you make a purchase. Automobiles, furniture, televisions, computers and clothes must all be thoroughly thought out and investigated. Talk to other consumers, get referrals, wait for sales, use coupons. Then after you purchase these items take care of them better than other people do. Be proud of your possessions and grateful for them. If you get a few more years out of these things than other people do it will amount to huge savings over the years for you. And will give you the ability to pay that little higher monthly payment on your 15 year mortgage. New is not always better.
3) Don’t let credit cards become a temptation and get you into trouble. If you feel vulnerable only use a debit card. This will be hard to do at times, especially if you have children. Children can make you justify bad purchases because they love to buy and they will pressure you into buying things you don’t need. All kids do this. So you will need to write out a budget. Your monthly income minus your monthly expenses. Every time you get close to making a purchase you can’t afford pull it out and look at it. Hopefully reality will sink in and stop you. There will be times you will have to give in to the kids’ buying impulses, so pick your spots on cheaper items that will satisfy them. So the secret to debt is to make smart decisions in the beginning on all your major purchases. Smaller house best neighborhood, 15 year mortgage, do a thorough due diligence on all purchases, take care of those possessions better than others, and finally live within your means.
If you follow these tips for 15 years you will become debt free and you will have less stress. You will be happier and actually content. Unfortunately most people will never achieve this feeling because either they don’t have this knowledge or they don’t have the discipline that it takes to make that dream a reality.
Use debt as a vehicle to necessities not for things you don’t really need.
Besides having the satisfaction of paying your house off 10–15 years earlier than others you will feel a huge shift in your feeling of independence and security. You will feel you breathe a little better.
Additionally you will save
$48,000 for every $100,000 borrowed versus a 25 year mortgage
$90,000 for every $100,000 borrowed versus a 30 year mortgage
NEVER BUY ON IMPULSE
Are you spending too much money lately and having a hard time not spending more than you are making. That’s because we all buy things we don’t need. And we buy these things on impulse. We think it will make us happy and we deserve it. Well here is an idea you should practice. If you’re out at the mall or any store shopping and you see something you think you want or deserve, stop. Don’t buy it. Take a 15 minute walk and think about the item. Ask yourself if you really need it. Is it worth the money or the financial strain I may be putting on myself. Most of the time if you’re honest with yourself you’ll talk yourself out of buying it. You’ll decide you really don’t need it. If after the 15 minute walk you still want it and can really afford it – buy it. Remember, before making a purchase take a 15 minute walk and never ever buy on impulse.
LIVE BELOW YOUR MEANS
In my research I found that many old timers always lived a notch or two below their means. It made them feel safe and secure. There is no better feeling in the world to be able live without any stress or fear when it comes to money. These old timers knew that by doing this they would feel more powerful and happier. I also feel it is one of the best pieces of wisdom I have gained. They never felt they were sacrificing anything for their families. To them the sense of security was better than the extra things they thought they needed but most of the time really didn’t.
BUYING OR LEASING A CAR
Buying or leasing a car is one of the most stressful things we all have to do in life. Here are some of the tips I picked up from people over the years on how to buy or lease a car. First thing is you need to make a relationship with a local dealer. How do you find a dealer? Usually through referrals. Meet the dealer personally and tell him you will be loyal to him for years, you have other friends relatives etc. This may be hard in the beginning but once you make the relationship its worth it. After you identify the dealer, next pick whether you’re buying or leasing, and the type of car you want. Then take your time prepare to spend about 3 – 14 days to do it right. The internet has made things a little easier. Go there a surf prices on the car of your choice and do your due diligence and after an hour or so you should know what your car’s price should be and approximately what the payments should be. I think in these economic times it is better to buy than lease. Pick the car that suits your lifestyle. If you have kids, pack lots of things and make sure the car has those features. Now here are the big tricks. Buy a one-year old car that was never licensed nor sold, with hardly any miles. Or a car with under 10,000 miles. You can save usually 20% right there. Even if you don’t qualify for the dealer’s 0% interest that’s ok. Ask your new friend the dealer to refer you to a local bank for a loan. The money you are saving more than makes up for the 0% interest. Next get a loan if possible for only 3 – 5 years never six. Tell the dealer you’ll buy the car if he extends the warranty to match the term of the loan. And ask him for free service on everything but tires and brakes to also match the length of the loan. He usually will agree to at least 1 – 2 years. Also try to get if 4 tires are needed any time while you own the car you pay for 2 and the dealer pays for two. They put cheap tires on these cars these days some only last 30 – 40,000 miles . If you are successful negotiating these things you will have no cost of anything pertaining to your car for that amount of time. Also always get free floor mats and little touch up paint free. If you get to know your dealer and take your time you will usually get the majority if not all these things. But remember before you pay and sign get everything written down and signed on a thing called a “Due Bill.” You will need to show that every time you go in for service.
ENGAGED IN LIFE
I love the term “engaged in life”. What does it mean. It means you got something going in this cockamamie world that turns you on. It could be financial or personal or both, whatever you are high on life and you feel invigorated. Hopefully if you’re not “engaged in life’ the wisdom and ideas in this book will start that fire.
Engaged in life—I love those words.
DRIVING YOUR CAR
When you do get your car there are a few things you should try to do that people don’t. Relax don’t always be rushing. Take a little extra time and enjoy the trip. Always take new routes to see different things. When I started in the real estate business in 1971 an old real estate guy told me “a good real estate person never takes the same route”. This tip shouldn’t be just for realtors it should be for everyone. Also if you really want to relax and enjoy get Sirius/XM radio. You can hear 50s 60s 70s 80s 90s update music, Larry King, Bill O’Reilly, stock market, major league baseball, golf all at your fingertips. If you have this service you really will slowdown and relax more. It makes long trips definitely go quicker. In our daily driving people are not very courteous to other drivers and especially rude to joggers, walkers and bicycle riders. We all need to do a better job on that. On turns drivers rush and almost run down the pedestrians trying to cross the street. Most of us are annoyed by their presence. We need to chill, enjoy our radio and be more polite. Another tip on red lights stay a few seconds after light changes to green and look one more time, lots of people run red lights, this tip can save your life. Also it’s ok to use regular gas. Most cars don’t need premium and it’s usually a waste of money.
PEOPLE WANT TOO MUCH
People want too much out of life. First they want a nice house, then a nice car, then a bigger house, a more expensive car, maybe 3 or 4 cars, country club, boat, vacation house, another country club. They go nuts spending like it’s a disease. They are never just happy or content because they are either waiting to buy another house, car, boat or too busy taking care of all the problems, maintenance and headaches these possessions bring. One nice house in the best neighborhood, nice car, country club, vacations are all great but then rent the rest. Stay loose, no headaches. Enjoy life and the freedom of not having too many possessions. Extra money in the bank is the best thing a person can have to make them feel independent and secure. It also will make you happier and prevent the stress most people never stop having until they die.
PATHS CROSSED
Did you ever hear people say their paths crossed for a reason? I like that idea. You meet someone socially or in business and sometimes you just get the idea that you and that person’s “paths crossed for a reason.” Try to find people in life that give you that feeling. Reading this book means “our paths crossed for reason” so I hope I don’t let you down.
If you could be a personal friend with someone famous who would it be?
ENVIRONMENT
You’re going to think I’m crazy on this one. The environment is like the biggest topic in the world now. We all want to help and we can do little things like my grandma always said turn off the lights in your house when you’re not using them. Watch your gas consumption. But here is something you should try and really practice. There is a friend of mine who got accepted to a prestigious university. He never thought he would ever be there and it was like a dream to him. He walked to classes and on his way regularly picked up pieces of paper and litter that were on the ground and put them in the nearby garbage cans. He said the other students thought he was goofy, that something seriously was wrong with him. He said he did it because he felt so privileged and proud to be at this place, he respected the campus and took pride in its beauty. So he picked up litter when he saw it. Maybe we all should take pride in our workplaces, our neighborhoods, the towns we live in. We sometimes forget that we are privileged to be alive enjoying life and this great country we live in. None of us can be like Al Gore but we can do this small thing. Lets help the environment this small way. Next time we see some litter on the ground at our workplace, neighborhood or around our town – let’s pick it up! It will actually make you feel good. Try it.
GROWING UP
Childhood is a wonderful thing. We don’t understand how important what happened to usas a kid shaped our lives. Things we saw, people who influenced us, our friends, what we did in those days of being a kid with the freedom of no work nor bills. But the people who shaped our lives the most are our parents. Whether our memories are good or bad they will always stay in our hearts and minds. We were made from them. My feet look just like my Dads. I loved my parents and I had a very happy life. Because of that I felt I didn’t want to disappoint them so therefore tried to do good things when I was a kid. Even today I feel since I didn’t have a bad childhood I owe it to society to be a good person. If I had skeletons in the closet, I probably wouldn’t feel that way but since I have great childhood memories it makes me act in a positive certain way. I know it may seem odd but if someone gives you a perfect start what excuse do you have for screwing up later in life? Its like the reverse of people who had a terrible childhood. Lots of them feel they have a reason to be a screw up. Weird huh. The thing I liked the most about my childhood was playing from morning to dark in the neighborhood. Lots of sports. Lots of kids all around. But the thing that I remember the most is when my parents wanted me they yelled as loud as they could through the neighborhood: “Larry!” Those were the days. We had no air conditioner, and many hot nights. Mosquito’s were really funny, buzzing your ears. There were 3 bedrooms in my house but my brother and I wanted to be together. No computer, no itouch, we just talked and laughed together. Just like Beaver and Wally in Leave it to Beaver.
I have the best brother in the world and we always got along great when we were young and now.
PARENTS
I had the greatest parents in the world. Remember when you were young you were embarrassed to be with your parents. Now I’m so proud of them. My dad died when he was 57 my Mom is still alive she is 83. It’s hard to believe that when you’re a baby your parents do everything for you feed you, clean your diapers and bathe you; they cook for you, dress you, teach you everything. Then when we’re 18 – 20s we leave them. Some kids hardly ever call their parents. Many don’t even live in same state and rarely see them. It’s a weird relationship change. I have noticed that the nicest people still honor their parents and will do anything for them. They cater to them and put them on a pedestal. It’s nice, sort of like a payback for what they did for us. One hard thing is as our parents get old, dementia, Alzheimer’s, and nursing homes are a thing you can’t avoid. It is complicated, guilt and other feelings set in . The kids who embrace this time in their parents lives and see them regularly will feel good when their parents die. See them as much as you can and you won’t feel guilty later. It should be something you want to do. Then when it’s your turn your kids will do the same for you, hopefully having learned from example. Where would we be without our parents?
GRANDPARENTS
They are great. They can spoil the kids and let them do little extra things they want. As grandparents, you can help mold your grand kid’s lives. Teach them while you can. Give them the wisdom you have learned and give them the secrets and the little tricks and wisdom you know about life. Tell them you’re there for them if they have problems or can’t talk to their parents on some issue. If you have more than one spend time with them individually you will get to know them better and they won’t be competing or fighting with their siblings.
Who was your favorite grandparent?
RESPECT YOUR ELDERS
Not many people respect their elders today. In the olden days whatever your father, mother, grandfather or grandmother said or did was quietly tolerated. They could say things way off beat and the younger family members would just say, “you’re right grandpa.” Not today. Today kids ridicule their elders right in their presence. They don’t open doors for them or even help them. They’re too busy, They’re too hip. When elders seem out of sorts, cut them a break. Honor them and most importantly have patience towards them. Remember you will be them soon.
SIBLINGS
The way to get along with siblings is to keep competition to a minimum. If possible not at all. Try not to talk about money. Try to be happy with their successes and try not to compare their lives to your life. They grew up from the same mold they are your blood. If they do good that shows your family is smart, your parents did a good job and should reflect on all of your family as a positive thing. Try to look at your family as one big team or company if one does good it should be a happy thing for everybody. I know it is a hard thing to do because it is human nature to compare ourselves to others, especially our siblings. Try not to compare your life to others. But if you just can’t do that remember money and success should not be the main comparison. You can put in health, spouse, kids, friends, free time, time for hobbies and just who is the happiest and content in their mind. Not comparing at all is best, but if you must, avoid money and success in the comparison.
KINDNESS
Kindness is the oil that takes the friction out of life. What does that mean? It means that people have so much conflict in their lives that when they meet someone who is truly kind to them their body and mind feels like it is being pleasantly lubricated. It’s like getting brain massaged and a welcome relief to one’s human spirit.
CONVERSATION
What do you consider a good conversation when you meet someone for the first time?
My friends usually say I am too inquisitive in my first conversation with people. I beg to differ. I say if I’m interested in knowing about the person and maybe someday we will become friends why not go for it. How will I know if there are any synergies there if I don’t ask any relevant questions. Are you married? Do you have kids? Are you still working? If yes what do you do? Do you golf? Do we have any mutual friends. I hardly ever meet anyone that is annoyed by these kind of questions. So when you meet someone whom you think could become a new potential friend don’t be afraid to ask questions. If they’re the kind of person who has exciting answers to your questions they will be glad you asked and happy to answer them.
Don’t listen to your friends. Sometimes in life you have to be a little outgoing.
You only live once. Be crazy and daring sometimes.
That’s the way life should be lived!
DUSTIN HOFFMAN
I recently went to the Palm Springs Film Festival Gala. Many of my favorite stars were there and spoke. Ron Howard showed clips of his movie career. Clint Eastwood did also and told some dry jokes, but very funny. Ben Stiller, Josh Brolin and Leonardo DiCaprio spoke. I waited all night to write something spectacular down but unfortunately only one bit of wisdom was memorable. Don’t get me wrong, they all did an outstanding job of speaking and telling stories but only one was worthy of going into my book of 40 years. The person shelling out the memorable piece of wisdom that night was Dustin Hoffman.
He said, “passion is the remedy to boredom”.
I love those words. I went home and wrote them in my book. And thought about them.
It means, “find something you’re passionate about and you’ll never be bored.” So simple but so true!
If others think your passion is a waste of time it doesn’t matter as long as it’s good therapy for you. One other caveat to this is, the passion shouldn’t be something that costs a lot of money, unless you are very rich and can afford it.
THREE GIRLS FROM CANADA
I knew these three girls from Canada who moved to my hometown when they were young. Their mother died in the 1960s when they were in high school. One was 15, one was 16, and one was17. Well a few months after her death their father decided he was going to marry another woman. They were upset with that situation so the three of them decided to move out of the house and live on their own. They lived in an apartment close to their high school. They worked after school and supported themselves. None of the three got in trouble, did drugs or got pregnant. To this day they never feel like they were cheated, they don’t have a chip on their shoulders or feel like they their lives were dysfunctional. They never complain, but they do feel cheated about losing the precious time with their mother and not being able to spend more time with her. Especially things later in life that Mothers and daughters do sharing life together. Like marriage, children, vacations, family get togethers, grand children and mother and daughter talks. But none of them are resentful towards life or mad at the world. They never looked for an excuse for anything and would never go on Jerry Springer Show and complain about poor me. They made the best of a bad situation and stuck by each other as a family three sisters. They had a positive attitude and as young trio welcomed the challenge. They wanted to show their father they could do it together. I like stories like that; I learn from them and they make me feel good. Imagine the youngest sister was only 15 years old and on her own. And that 15 year old later became my wife Sandy. Her mother was Edna Marie Jones, April 11, 1925 - September 23, 1965.
TELEVISION
Ever hear people say television is no good? Well they are wrong. I love television. Television can bring the family together. When I was young we watched our certain favorite shows every night. We all sat together, had snacks and cuddled up. We talked about the shows, the characters, laughed, cried, it was great. We were all together. We do the same today. Instead of Ed Sullivan, Donna Reed and Father Knows Best, it’s American Idol, Dancing With The Stars and 2 ½ Men.
Whatever your taste is television is a great source of family time together.
Get the biggest screen you can with good sound.
Get your snacks and all cuddle up on the sofa. Now that’s living.
What is your favorite television show of all time?
BE DIFFERENT
If you want to be remembered by people be different. What does that mean? I don’t mean weird, I mean be a little different have an individual style or a kind of caring personality hardly ever seen by people. People normally are not relaxed they don’t have time to talk to people and be concerned about them. That’s because they are unhappy with their lives. When you become happy and content a whole new world opens up you see people as something special and you talk to them in a more caring way. The best two best ideas I’ve seen to achieve this in business are:
1) Dress uniquely or a little different. One guy I knew wore Hollywood kind of stuff to business meetings. Wild shirts, big belts, snazzy shoes, musical watches. He also was a nice person. Always happy and upbeat. The people remembered him more than they remember the business deal they worked on. Bring a style to your life that others don’t have: a sense of style or flair.
2) To be memorable to a Big Shot customer you’re dealing with make yourself memorable to the Big Shot’s secretary or assistant. That person in some ways is more important than the boss because they make lots of decisions for the boss. They have a lot of interaction and dialogue with the boss. They may go to lunch together, to parties or elsewhere. If that assistant likes you it will go a long way for your success with that person. I guarantee your name will come up in their small talk with Mr. Big. I know a guy who always brings flowers on the first visit to the secretary/assistant. Another person I know brings See’s candy. Also on occasion ask them about their lives. Friends, mutual hobbies or interests.
Make small talk with them. If these people get to like you, I guarantee you, their liking of you will rub off on Mr. Big in a positive way. Bottom line your business life goes fast, people are bored with their jobs and life in general. So have some fun, perk up their lives and give them some free entertainment.
SMILE AND WAVE HELLO
A good thing to do is to wave hello a lot to people. Why you say? Because when you wave to people it makes them feel good. They get like a little lift from another human being acknowledging them. They get like one little inch of self esteem or an itty-bitty feeling of, I’m important or well known. People like me. So I wave to neighbors while I’m driving my car or my bike. I even smile and nod to strangers throughout the day. Most people wave and smile back. Both the person waving and the person they’re waving at feel good. They think people must like them. They think they must look good or important since people are all waving and smiling back. Waving and waving back is just one of those win-win things. Everybody feels happy when they do it.
ANTICIPATION
Ever wait all week to go to a party or a concert you think it’s going to be fun and exciting. You dress extra carefully, maybe you buy a new outfit. You get there and BLAH! The anticipation was better than the actual event. You say to yourself – I waited all week for this. My family, my friends, my home—they’re all more exciting than this. What does coming to this conclusion mean? It means most social events in life are overrated and life’s everyday events are underrated. It means you should be more excited about your family, your friends, your house, the simple things of life. Believe it or not these simple things are much more exciting and actually more fun. It reminds me of teenagers. They never want to be home. They always want to be doing something. Can’t relax. They feel moving and being in action makes you happy. They feel they have to be searching for happiness and stimulation. If you are smart you can create the happiness and stimulation with your family and friends around your own environment.
You don’t need to keep searching all the time for stimulation and happiness. It’s right in front of you. Just be intuitive enough to recognize it!