Chaiya’s Lyrics
Testament One
Chaiya Zahara
Smashwords Edition
ISBN information
Dedication
I dedicate this book, my genesis, to my children. To you I speak these words of encouragement; be an instrument for God’s pleasure. Turn the plucks, blows and beats in your life into a song of His grace and for His glory.
Introduction
As long as I can remember, music has been a part of my life. My father sung in a gospel group. He mingled with the likes of Edward Hawkins. My aunt and uncle played piano. On holidays the entire family would get together and sing familiar gospel songs. When I was a young girl I was one of the soloist in our church choir. I used to go with my mother to musicals at different churches. I remember watching people become so emotional that they'd cry while a choir or group was singing a song.
Trials of life have taught me the power of praise and worship. Now I understand where the tears and shouts of joy came from. When I did not know what to say or how to pray, I remembered the lyrics “yes Jesus love’s me.” Music had become an essential part of my life. I sing when I’m happy, I sing when I’m sad, and I sing when I’m angry. Music is the source of my strength. These songs became the essence and power of my personal worship. My experiences, situations and circumstances are like the lyrics and melodies of a ballad. I’ve heard other songs and even sung them myself. They brought healing, peace and joy to my life. Now I write my own lyrics.
Contents
1
Daddy’s Gurl
Possessed
Psalm 1 Confession
Slave Exchange
In Here
Promises
Stuck
Litany of Thanks
Abba's Creation
2
Wombman
Natural Highs
Silent Screams
Today
Inner Me
Sanctuary
3
Relations
Auntie.doc
Sista Keeper
Bothersome Calls
Subordinates.
4
Imprudent Love
Mirage
Not Mine
A Flower In My Hair
Around the Curve
Candle Wax
Off the Ride
Sorry Again
I Propose
5
Eros
Carry Your Kiss
My Soul Was Satisfied
Selah
Sugarcane
Yearning
Mistress
Enticement of Purple
6
Random
Speak Up
Believe
A Church
This House
7
Portal
Paused to Remember
Wisdom and Discernment
Knowledge and Understanding
Stubborn
Ps 25
Life is an opportunity, benefit from it. Life is beauty, admire it. Life is bliss, taste it. Life is a dream, realize it. Life is a challenge, meet it. Life is a duty, complete it. Life is a game, play it. Life is a promise, fulfill it. Life is sorrow, overcome it. Life is a song, sing it. Life is a struggle, accept it. Life is a tragedy, confront it. Life is an adventure, dare it. Life is luck, make it. Life is too precious, do not destroy it. Life is life, fight for it.
~ Mother Teresa ~
1
Daddy's Gurl
Possessed
I figured it out! I was reading this book called the bible and now it all makes perfect sense. I am possessed. It is a spirit that keeps taking over my heart and mind. Its name is "Holy". Yeah, Holy Spirit is what they call it. It likes to get inside of people and just take over there entire life. So, from time to time I get these outbursts or frenzies of joy, laughter, songs and words of hope and encouragement. I just never know. It can come out of nowhere. Worst than that it can happen at any time. I am finding out this Holy Spirit has been the one making me feel all panicky when I am about to do something wrong. Guess what else He did, I think it's a guy spirit. Anyway, the other day when I was sad, He started digging up all these memories of fun I used to have, and victories I won and things I had overcome. He tricked me into smiling. Next thing you know I got all excited and I started dancing with absolutely no music playing. Just craziness. The more I read I find out these are not the only things this spirit does when He gets hold of you. Remember that movie "The Invasion of the Body Snatchers" or the "Borges" from Star Trek? He's got both of those beat. Firstly, there is only one of Him. He gets into you and starts making you do things like "Jesus" did. I hear they are related somehow. It's downright peculiar. Be warned He is dangerous, I am telling you. I can be just going about my business and this Holy Spirit just takes over the driver seat and puts my soul on lockdown until He decides I’m ready to get in the seat again. He acts like I am a student driver or something. Go figure. This Holy Spirit is extremely contagious. You have to watch who you are around because if the "Holy Spirit" has them, He can get you too. Then we will all be possessed.
Psalm 1 Confession
Blessed is this woman who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked or stand in the way of sinners or sit in the seat of mockers.
My delight is in the law of the LORD, and on Your law I meditate day and night.
I am like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in my season and my leaf will not wither. Whatever, I will prosper.
Slave Exchange
I was thinking...
I am a slave. I was born a slave and I will die a slave. Although I am still a slave I have a new master. Jesus Christ bought me.
With my former Master I had no rights. I did what my flesh/lust told me to do. As a slave to God I find that I still have no rights. I still have to do what my Master says to do.
It was so much easier to do what my old Master, Sin, told me to do, but I was utterly miserable and always sick in my mind, soul, body, and spirit.
Now at times I find it so much more difficult to do what my new Master, Jesus Christ, tells me to do, yet I find so much peace in my mind, soul, health in my body and fulfillment in my spirit when I do. Utter joy!
Peculiar?
Just a thought.....
In here, in here
Run!!!
This urgency comes over me to run. At first I don’t know why I am running. Then I can see them.
Embarrassment
Humiliation
Shame
Disillusionment
Disappointment
Despair
Guilt
Grief
Anger
Discontentment
Uncertainty
Sorrow
Hopelessness
Fear
They are all chasing me. My heart is racing. Why are they chasing me? I am filled with panic as I run aimlessly with no destination in mind or sight. I lost them.
Run!!!
No, I hear them. I run faster as they begin to scream. Taunting sounds consume my thoughts as they all laugh in delight at my perceived demise.
Reverberations devour my strength as my soul slowly becomes paralyzed. I stumble.
Pst... pst...
In here, in here
Come in here. You can hide in here.
I hear a sound that resonates through the noise; soft yet consistent. I will hide you in my secret place.
I lift myself up and go inside. There I sit and watch quietly as they all run passed…
Promises
God is…
Shelter
Hiding place
Strength
Rescue
Covering
Shield
God will…
Deliver from fear
Make enemies fall
Punish the wicked
No harm will come
No disaster will come
Angels will protect you
Angels will carry you
You will be a conqueror
You will be victorious
God knows your name
God will hear you when you call
God will honor you
God will bless you…
With a long life
With a purposeful life
With an eternal life
Stuck
I did not want to let go. I was scared to stay yet too scared to walk away. I had confessed, repeated and forgave but something was still lingering. I had not been honest. I had come to a place somewhere in the middle. I had been in a relationship in which I noticed some things that concerned me about the person at the time. Some things reminded me of hurts from my past. Other things where revealed to me by the Holy Spirit. I felt that I should sever the relationship. Yet I never did.
I found myself finding reasons to stay in contact or involved. Memories would flood my mind and all of a sudden I could see no wrong. I began to make excuses for the very attributes that led me to my decision in the first place. I told myself that I was the sole problem. I knew what I needed to suppress or tolerate in order to make things work. The truth of the matter was, I was scared and I did not trust God. Fear and unbelief keep me bound. I did not want to be alone. I did not want to start over again with someone else. I was scared that there would never be anyone else or it would be several more years before he would find me. Those thoughts were lies that consumed my mind.
My lack of faith had rendered me ineffective in the things of God and in my personal life. I was stressed out and confused. As I cried out to God, He reminded me that so many times before He had delivered me and blessed me. He said He had a plan for my life. He told me that He wanted me to be happy, to prosper and be in good health in my mind/soul, body and spirit. He said He did not want me to hurt and He was not the one confusing me. He told me He would give me hope again. My future would be better than my past. He said He heard my cries and He was and still is listening.
Releasing the past means you have to trust God. If you have not put your faith in God you are just going through the motions. You cannot please God if you don’t have faith. You don’t have faith if you lack hope. Faith is the things you hope for. It is not hope if you see it. Walking in faith is putting the past behind you and is the evidence that you believe or have faith that God will fulfill His promises. Stop trying to figure it out. You have no control over the outcome. Choose faith in God. Put a blindfold over the eyes of your flesh and let God lead you.
Litany of Thanks
You are the Alpha and the Omega, Thank You Jesus.
You are the Beginning and the End, Thank You Jesus.
You are the King of the universe, Thank You Jesus.
You are the King of kings, Thank You Jesus.
You are the Lord of lords, Thank You Jesus.
You are Emmanuel, God with us, Thank You Jesus.
You are the Christ, Thank You Jesus.
You are the Messiah, Thank You Jesus.
You are the Living Word, Thank You Jesus.
You are the only Truth, Thank You Jesus.
You are the Bread of Life, Thank You Jesus.
You are the Balm of Gilead, Thank You Jesus.
You are my Life, my Love, Thank You Jesus.
You are my Portion and Cup, Thank You Jesus.
You are my Strength and my Song, Thank You Jesus.
You are my Redeemer, Thank You Jesus.
You are my Justification, Thank You Jesus.
You are my Righteousness, Thank You Jesus.
You are my Salvation, Thank You Jesus.
You are my Sanctification, Thank You Jesus
You are the Lifter of my head, Thank You Jesus.
You are the Way for my life, Thank You Jesus.
You are the air I breathe, Thank You Jesus.
You are my Doctor, Thank You Jesus.
You are my Healing and Wholeness, Thank You Jesus.
You are my Lawyer, Thank You Jesus.
You are my Defense, Thank You Jesus.
You are my Hiding Place, Thank You Jesus.
You are my Fortress, Thank You Jesus.
You are my Victory, Thank You Jesus.
You are my Champion and Shield, Thank You Jesus.
You are my Provider, Thank You Jesus.
You are my Maker, Thank You Jesus.
You are my Wisdom, Thank You Jesus.
You are my Joy, Thank You Jesus.
You are my Patience, Thank You Jesus
You are my Peace, Thank You Jesus.
You are my Song, Thank You Jesus.
You are the Wonderful Counselor, Thank You Jesus.
You are the Prince of Peace, Thank You Jesus.
You are the Bridegroom, Thank You Jesus.
You are the Solid Reality, Thank You Jesus.
You are the Strong Tower, Thank You Jesus.
You are our Fortress, Thank You Jesus.
You are the Just Judge, Thank You Jesus.
You are the Deliverer, Thank You Jesus.
You are the Lamb of God, Thank You Jesus.
You are the Lion of Judah, Thank You Jesus.
You are the Light of the World, Thank You Jesus.
You are the Bright Morning Star, Thank You Jesus.
You gave me a good job, Thank You Jesus.
You gave me brand new house, Thank You Jesus.
You gave me a husband, Thank You Jesus.
You gave me daughters, Thank You Jesus.
You gave me sons, Thank You Jesus.
You gave me grandchildren, Thank You Jesus.
You gave me friends, Thank You Jesus.
You supplied every need, Thank You Jesus.
You gave me food to eat, Thank You Jesus.
You gave me clothes to wear, Thank You Jesus.
You forgave me, Thank You Jesus.
You kept my mind, Thank You Jesus.
You delivered me from depression, Thank You Jesus.
You wiped my tears, Thank You Jesus.
You taught me to fight, Thank You Jesus.
You protected me, Thank You Jesus.
You guided me when I did not have any direction, Thank You Jesus.
You restored my sight, Thank You Jesus
You healed my body, Thank You Jesus.
You increased my knowledge, Thank You Jesus.