Essential Philosophy: Happiness, Relationships, and Sex
Raja Sharma
Copyright@2011 Raja Sharma
Smashwords Edition
All Rights Reserved.
Preface
I am trying to give you as many examples I can just to convince you that all that makes you happy in this world is essentially physical and it is momentary but some of you might be there who have attained to the state of consciousness or unconsciousness where they feel infinite happiness which is never going to end. They are able to easily convert their pains into happiness because they have learned the art of understanding and seeing the world as if they were seeing a dream. They have disillusioned themselves and they realize that bodily pleasures and pains are transitory. There can be unending happy state of mind but there cannot be unending pain. Once you have reached the highest rung of happiness, you see the pain taking last breaths at the lowest rung. It has stopped following you and you are a blessed person.
Chapter One
Happiness is not something which can be defined in general term, for the causes are different and the experiencers are different. One particular thing can make you happy but the same thing can make someone very sad. Mr. Smith is happy because he has been blessed with a son, but his neighbour, Mr. Brown, is very sad because he has already got six sons and his wife is going to deliver the seventh one. Mr. Brown’s happiness will return with the birth of his first daughter. Just a jest, and there is nothing serious in it.
I am not concerned about your happiness that is momentary, the result of something which is in the form of material. I am going to talk about the happiness which is a state. Your happiness depends on you, and your state of consciousness, or unconsciousness. It can be everlasting, without decreasing even when you are asleep.
You must be thinking what a foolish idea it is! How can a person be happy in his sleep? Have you never been happy in your sleep? If not, then you have not been acquainted with the real happiness, the state of happiness, which begins to dwell permanently in your mind and existence if you are ready to open the doors.
Some scholars and philosophers divide people in types and there are some who do not divide at all. Osho divided people in two types: the sleeping ones and the awakened ones, and, of course, a small part in between. I am not in favour of this division because I can’t divide people in types; I can never find two similar minds in this world. If I begin to believe that one million people are really awake and six million people are sleeping because they have not experienced something divine happening to them, then I will be wrong because I will be befooling you. How can there be division? No two minds are similar and if we try to make two minds similar, it will be like training or conditioning them. I am against any kind of conditioning when it comes to dealing with the terms like happiness.
Happiness, your very personal happiness, is the result of your state of consciousness. You are very tired and you want to sleep, but there is a phone call and the caller informs you that you have won a lottery of one million dollars and you can collect the amount the following morning from the office of the caller, your sleep disappear. You forget about your sleep and the whole night passes in making plans with your wife, calculating and making the list of the things which you are going to buy with the amount you are going to get the following morning. A few hours before you had not even dreamed of that money but suddenly that call came and you became more conscious. You have become the owner of one million dollars.
If you are looking for the happiness which results from such material rewards, you don’t need to continue to read because I am leading you towards the state where momentary happiness transcends to be permanent happiness. During your sleep, pleasure is happiness. It is a sensation, achieved through body or physicality. You can’t achieve your happiness through your body or the external forces, or the material rewards which you get from time to time. As I told you earlier that your happiness depends on your state of consciousness or unconsciousness, so body becomes irrelevant here.
All physical pleasures are momentary, and likewise all physical pains are momentary. They follow each other in circles because your body exists in duality: life and death exist together in you. You are living and you are dying. You are very happy while having sex with your girlfriend or wife but the moment it is over you are tired, all your energy drained out. You say you are happy but actually you are not. You were definitely happy while you were performing the act but the moment it ended your happiness disappeared. You are lying without a movement, you are too lazy to move, you are in a physical state that can be compared to near to pain.
All your pleasure is always followed by pain and all your pain is followed by pleasure. Mind it, we are only talking about the pleasure and pain that is the result of your body’s involvement. In your physical pleasure, you are never comfortable because there is a fear lurking behind that you are going to lose this pleasure in a few moments. The sense of fear poisons your existence. You fall into pain and you want to get the pleasure back. This is the cycle of birth and death. Neither your pleasure nor your pain remains constant. They come and go in their turns.
People who are not awake, I mean, conscious of the existence in it infinity, only know about a few sensations of the body. They know nothing else. Their pleasure is mostly derived from food, sex, and money. They live in a very confined world, a world of bodily incited sensations. Some people limit their pleasure and pain to only two things: food and sex, but I say that there are many other things in their physical form which can be responsible for their momentary pleasure and pain.
You are hungry, you are deprived of energy, and you want to eat something. Delicious food does wonders to you and you are momentarily happy. When one aspect of the bodily pleasure is complete, you want the release of the sexual energy. You want to perform sex to get the ultimate pleasure which you think is ultimate. You perform the sexual act with your partner and you feel momentary relief and satisfaction. Then you fall asleep. In the morning you begin to work but you don’t get enough customers in your shop and the business is not good. Now money is required, urgently required, because you have to pay the rent tomorrow. You are in pain, you have forgotten food, you have forgotten sex, and only one thing how to arrange money is in your mind. This is just an example to tell you that your pleasures and pains are so cheaply bought. There are more people in this world who live to eat than the people who eat to live. The latter don’t pawn their pleasure or pain to food.
Having seen the shores of the American land, Columbus must have felt the momentary happiness but at the same time he must have felt renewed pain of surviving in that unknown world. Secondly he must have been worried about going back to his own country. He had seen the hardships of the one way voyage and that discovery of America was definitely not going to tell the ocean to be calm like a lake to let Columbus go back without any difficulty.
I am trying to give you as many examples I can just to convince you that all that makes you happy in this world is essentially physical and it is momentary but some of you might be there who have attained to the state of consciousness or unconsciousness where they feel infinite happiness which is never going to end. They are able to easily convert their pains into happiness because they have learned the art of understanding and seeing the world as if they were seeing a dream. They have disillusioned themselves and they realize that bodily pleasures and pains are transitory. There can be unending happy state of mind but there cannot be unending pain. Once you have reached the highest rung of happiness, you see the pain taking last breaths at the lowest rung. It has stopped following you and you are a blessed person.
A young man was in the company of a young lady. She was his first date and he want to make his first date memorable. The young man was inexperienced in such matters so he tried to make his partner happy by suggesting different plans. He cautiously asked the young lady if she would like to go bowling. She replied that she did not care to go bowling. He then suggested a movie, but she answered that she did not care for them. While trying to think of something else he offered her a cigarette which she declined. He then asked if she would like to dance and drink at the new disco. She again declined by saying she did not care for those things. In desperation he asked her to come to his apartment for a night of lovemaking. To his surprise she happily agreed, kissed him passionately and said, "You see, you don't need any of those things to have a good time!"
Your happiness depends on you. The people who are not awake, I mean who are not conscious of the existence, the world, the universe, the nature, only pleasant sensations mean happiness. They begin to live from one pleasure to another. They begin to rush from one sensation to another. They are thrilled with small sensations. Their life is very superficial and they never experience depths. They live the world in quantity and not the quality.
I have heard a Sufi telling a flower, “I would willingly give away all the worldly riches and pleasures just to learn how to develop everlasting fragrance which you have. I would like to live like you, smiling in wind and rain, though existing for a much shorter span than we human beings!”
I was really touched by the words of that Sufi. I concluded that the man who could talk to flowers could only be mad and a mad man is always happy because your small sensations and pleasures don’t even touch him.
Then there are those people who are neither asleep nor awake, I mean who oscillate between sleep and wakefulness. The world has a very large number of such people. They begin many things in their life but they rarely complete their adventures. They are thrilled when they begin something but with the progression of time, they realize the difficulties in the way, and as a result they drop their project and begin to look for something else. Even in their sleep they are worried about the money they have kept in their locker. They are very much present at the breakfast table but instead of concentrating at their toast and butter, they are thinking whether they are going to be reprimanded by their boss in the office.
I know many people who have all the modern gadgets like TV, computers, refrigerators, washing machines in their houses but I have never seen them updated with news items or the popular TV shows, they hardly know anything about their computers, their washing machines have never been switched on because they send their clothes to the laundry, and their kitchen remains spick and span because they rarely eat at home. They are happy with the accumulation of things because their ego is satisfied and they don’t want to be left behind.
My wife is a very simple woman and she is highly susceptible to outside influence. She wants that our daughter should be a doctor, engineer, beautician, or someone with academic degree to easily get a job. I try to convince her that life is not only jobs and appointments. After a while, she answers that not all the people in this world are stupid, otherwise they would not pursue such career.
I had an interesting question answer session with her:
My Wife: You have three Masters’ degrees but you are involved in this small business of selling cosmetics and teaching students. Why?
Raja: I am a writer, a philosopher, and above all a human being who is totally alive.
My Wife: Why do they become doctors then?
Raja: To cure me when I am sick.
My Wife: Engineers?