THE SOUL'S MIRROR
REFLECTIONS ON THE FULLNESS OF LIFE
Written By
Dana LaMon
Smashwords Edition
Copyright 2011 by Dana LaMon
All rights reserved.
ISBN: 978-0-9656633-5-9
Library of Congress Catalog Number: 97-93087
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Lancaster, California 93539-6108
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DEDICATION
To Mom and Dad, who started my life.
To Jaci, who brought fullness to my life.
To Dana, Winter, Anton, and Linnea, who show the joy of life.
To God, Who is the power of my life.
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And the Lord God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul. [Genesis 2:7]
I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly. [John 10:10]
Pleasant words are as a honeycomb, sweet to the soul, and health to the bones. [Proverbs 16:24]
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TABLE OF CONTENTS
Acknowledgments
Preface
Looking In The Soul's Mirror
PART 1: WHAT IS LIFE ABOUT?
Life
Abundance
Success
Joy
Soul
Mind
God
Purpose
PART 2: LIVING THE POSSIBILITIES
Possibilities
Dream
Empowerment
Control
Desire
Goal
Attitude
Support
PART 3: MAKING IT HAPPEN
Action
Drive
Priorities
Habit
Punctuality
Organization
Excellence
Passionate
Perfection
PART 4: A HIGH STANDARD OF LIVING
Values
Morality
Righteousness
Respect
Generosity
Honesty
Trustworthiness
Commitment
PART 5: WHO AM I?
Self-Image
Uniqueness
Identity
Self-Assessment
Worth
Egotism
Self-Esteem
PART 6: DOING WHAT I CAN
Ability
Talent
Will
Can
Help
PART 7: BEING MINDFUL OF LIFE
Thoughts
Beliefs
Knowledge
Experiences
Believe
Imagination
Faith
PART 8: THE FEEL OF LIFE
Emotions
Love
Sorrow
Hope
Guilt
Courage
Loneliness
Despair
Fear
Hatred
PART 9: LIVING SKILLS
Learning
Communicate
Compromise
Gratitude
Loving
Criticism
Giving
Compliments
Communication
PART 10: PRINCIPLES OF SUCCESS
Succeed
Confidence
Vision
Encouragement
Initiative
Resolve
Determination
Focus
Quitting
Beginnings
Endurance
Perseverance
PART 11: REVIVING THE SOUL
Rejuvenescence
Quietude
Balance
Prayer
Religion
PART 12: PEOPLE WHO NEED PEOPLE
Independence
Marriage
Family
Association
Friendship
Altruism
PART 13: RIGHT TIME; RIGHT PLACE
Circumstances
Opportunity
Options
Change
Obstacles
Challenge
Optimism
Adaptability
Adversity
Temperance
PART 14: STUMBLING BLOCKS
Dependence
Rejection
Uncertainty
Failure
Doubt
Negativism
Conformity
Excuses
Comfort
PART 15: IMPETUS TO SUCCEED
Incentives
Money
Competition
Motivation
Inspiration
Achievements
Winning
Spirituality
Time
Daily Reading Calendar
Alphabetical Index
About the Author
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ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
The title page of this book identifies Dana LaMon as its author. While I am responsible for the content, including any overlooked errors, it deceptively omits a number of people who were instrumental in the development and completion of this work. I devote the next two pages to acknowledge nine individuals without whose work and support this book would not be what it is.
Thank you Jacqueline Louise Jones LaMon for being a constant support and critic. From the very inception of the idea of this book to its publication, Jaci [pronounced like Jackie] encouraged me to pursue the project. She had the viewpoint as my wife to see that my life off the platform reflected the message that I present as a motivational and inspirational speaker. She traveled with me and was able to discern the reactions of the audience to the ideas that I shared. She took my advice and discovered applicability to her own life. With such three-dimensional perspective, she was the ideal person to watch the development of the book to ensure that the end product reflected the initial idea.
I appreciate Jaci's candor, offered in love, in letting me know when ideas were not clearly or fully explained. She kept reminding me of who my readers would be so that I would write to be easily understood. Because we share the same penchant for grammatical correctness, she was an excellent proofreader.
Thank you Dusty Adams for the cover design.
Thank you Harvey Harrison for your insightful comments on the first draft and your assistance in locating a publisher.
Thank you Juanita Ingram for your painstaking effort to ensure that The Soul's Mirror reflected no spelling or grammatical blemishes.
Thank you Dr. Peter C. Meade for offering moral and financial support for this book.
Thank you Mary Pagliaro for your vital proofreading services.
Thank you Joe Sweeney for keeping me working on the project. Joe, a mentor in the development of my professional speaking business, never failed to ask about the progress of the book each time that we talked.
Thank you Sharon White-Senghor for accepting the job as an editor. As I expected when I asked her to edit, Sharon, a Yale classmate, unhesitatingly rejected what she believed would not work for you, the reader.
Thank you Dorothy Williams for proofreading, editing, and getting the project moving when it stalled. As a professor of English, Dottie was able to offer critical comments on grammar and style. More important, however, were her words of encouragement at a point when continuation of the project was in question.
In addition to these special nine, I must thank all those people, the names of most I do not know, who talked to me after hearing me speak and asked if I had a book. Your inquiries revealed the need to put in writing what I shared from the platform.
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PREFACE
On August 30, 1992, the Antelope Valley Press, a local newspaper of Lancaster, California, printed the text of the speech "Take A Chance" with which I won the World Championship of Public Speaking eight days prior. The following day, my wife answered a telephone call from a neighbor who reported that she had read the speech three times. After the first reading she was impressed and wanted to read it again. Following the second time, she thought that the message was pretty sound. Reading it the third time, she said to herself, "He is absolutely right. I must not allow comfort to stop me from finishing my education." The day that she called us to share her response to the speech she re-enrolled in college.
The greatest compliment is paid when a person tells me of the actions he or she has taken toward the fulfillment of life as a result of something I said. It pleases me to inspire and motivate others. It does not matter who is in the audience. I speak to students from elementary school to college. I speak to prison inmates and to religious congregations. I speak to those who own their businesses as well as to employees. Corporate managers and government officials benefit from my message. Why? Because they are all people, and my message is about people. About life. About the joy and success of life that all people innately long to experience.
My presentations are unique because I share my personal experiences as a blind man in a world of people who rely on sight.
On the other hand, my message is borrowed. I first heard it in church when I was quite young. It stems from the words of Jesus Christ as reported by the gospel writer John: "I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly." [John 10:10]
Though both my Sunday school teacher and my pastor interpreted this to be a promise of bliss to be enjoyed after death, I have come to understand and believe it to be a promise of life now.
In the same passage reference is made to the "thief" who comes "to steal, and to kill, and to destroy".
I see in this Biblical passage an immutable law of the universe: every life is to be life in abundance so long as the forces of destruction can be resisted.
As I contemplated this universal law and sought to understand it in the context of the things I learned in school and in church, from reading and talking to other people, and from my experiences, I discovered two rudimentary components of the law.
First, abundant life is a promise conferred upon one at birth. It is not something that one has to first discover and then strive during all one's time on this earth to attain.
Second, the forces that steal, kill, and destroy do so from within. Words, events, or circumstances can deprive one of abundant life only by infiltrating one's mind or attacking one's soul.
Along with the understanding of the universal law of abundance was an instinctive recognition of my purpose in life: To help others to experience fulfillment in theirs. I was not certain how this purpose would be achieved, however.
Initially, it appeared that I would achieve my purpose in life through a religious ministry. When I was sixteen years old, I started speaking to my peers in youth gatherings at my church and other congregations in the Los Angeles area. I became deeply involved in the administration and ministry of the church after completing college. In 1980, I was offered the pastorship of a small congregation. Because I did not feel it to be my calling, I declined.
In 1991, I came by an unanticipated opportunity to have an impact on the lives of others. I started a business as a motivational and inspirational speaker. My decision to do so was prompted by the reaction of audiences to the speeches I delivered in contests of Toastmasters International. I perceived that people longed to be motivated and inspired to see their worth and to strive for joy and success.
Very quickly, I learned that outside of Toastmasters there was a hunger for words of encouragement and inspiration and a desire for a message of possibilities. After a while, members of the audiences began requesting tapes of my speeches. And then they wanted the message in writing.
This book is an effort to put in writing what I enjoy communicating orally. It is based on my life because me is whom I know best.
It is my belief that the ideas expressed in The Soul's Mirror can inspire you and/or provoke you to think about your life and what you are doing with it. As you take time to read, spend a moment to reflect on your own experiences.
If after reading and reflecting, your life is enhanced, I will be pleased. The project will have been worth the effort.
If on your first look at The Soul's Mirror you see nothing applicable to you, hold on to it. Keep it in a place where you can quickly put your hands on it. As sure as you live, there will be a time when encouragement, inspiration, or motivation will help to get you back on track to fullness of life. That is what this book is for.
Dana LaMon, 1997
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LOOKING IN THE SOUL'S MIRROR
This book is intended to be a reference to aid you in understanding the universal law of abundant life, the unbounded realm of possibilities, and your potential for realizing joy and success. It is designed to be a tool with which you can discover your purpose in life, unleash your potential, and maintain your motivation to achieve the desires of your heart. This reference and tool can best be used when you know its design and construction.
The Soul's Mirror contains 122 topics ranging from Ability to Worth. (See the index for a complete, alphabetical list of the topics.) The one-word titles have been assigned to each segment to facilitate your finding specific words of encouragement, motivation, or inspiration when you need them most. For example: If you face tragedy, you may wish to read the topic Sorrow or the topic Hope. If you are planning to marry, you may choose to read Marriage, Commitment, and/or Compromise. You may benefit from reading Perseverance if you are feeling discouraged because your sales calls are not netting the results you desire.
To avoid being didactic or sounding preachy, I have written the "Upon reflection" portion of each topic in the first person. The risk in doing so is the chance that I appear to be egotistical with the overuse of "I". My desire to avoid egotism is as strong as that to avoid didactic and preachy.
On the other hand, the benefit to using the first-person voice is that the language lends itself to personal reflection. If you agree with the ideas and message of the topic and wish to adopt it as your own, it is already written in your voice. You can select specific portions as your positive affirmations.
Many pages--indeed volumes--could be written on any of the topics included here. I have chosen to write very short essays. The brevity serves two purposes. First is to accommodate a busy schedule. If you are presently traveling on the road to success or are preparing to make that journey, you are already working on a schedule that squeezes every minute out of each hour. How and where do you find the time to read a few hundred pages of a book written to motivate you? The Soul's Mirror makes the task easy by dividing the motivational material into short segments. Now you only have to find about five minutes in your daily schedule. You can get up five minutes earlier. Or you can go to bed five minutes later. Read while you sip your coffee or while on hold on the telephone. Five of the several minutes in the doctor's waiting room or at the airport can be better invested.
The second purpose for the short topics is to provide chewable chunks of motivational morsels. To obtain the greatest benefit in learning, self-improvement, and motivation you should take the information a little at a time. Consider, reflect, and process each subject before you move to the next.
Each of the 122 topics contains a cross-reference. Included in the cross-references are other topics that relate to the one that you have read. This is particularly useful if you are selecting your reading according to your need for encouragement, motivation, or understanding.
The 122 topics have been grouped into fifteen divisions. The categorizing is not a perfect one. For example, the topic Hatred is included with other topics on emotions, but it could also have been included in the group of "Stumbling Blocks". The groupings will benefit the reader who desires to read several pieces with a related theme in one sitting.
So that The Soul's Mirror can be used as daily inspiration, a Daily Reading Calendar has been included as an appendix. If you follow this calendar, you will read through the book three times in a year. From April 7 through August 6, you will read the book in the order presented.
An index has been included to provide you with an easy reference to find the topic you need. Because it is presented alphabetically, you can quickly determine if a subject is or is not addressed in this book.
Keep The Soul's Mirror handy. At your bedside. On the coffee table. In your car. At your desk. In your purse or briefcase. Where will you be when you need a moment to reflect on your life? You could be anywhere. And everywhere that you are, you should be able to reflect on the fullness of life.
How many times have you looked into a mirror, or even a large plate-glass window, to see a reflection of yourself? We are very concerned with how we appear outwardly to others. Allow The Soul's Mirror to be your looking glass to reflect the innermost part of you. There is beauty for you to behold.
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THE SOUL’S MIRROR
REFLECTIONS ON THE FULLNESS OF LIFE
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PART 1: WHAT IS LIFE ABOUT?
Life is that segment of eternity during which my soul, mind, and body join to interact with the universe.
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LIFE
Life is not just a bowl of cherries; it is the whole tree. Cultivate it well and you will enjoy its fruit forever.
I was born fifteen minutes after my twin sister Delora on Sunday, September 14, 1952, at 6:10 AM. My sister and I were the first two of seven children that Eddie Mae Askew and Jesse James Lamon had together. I was born black, male, but not blind. These physical characteristics were readily observed and duly noted on the certificate of live birth. What is not written is that I was also born with a mind and a soul. These, I am sure, were presumed.
Upon reflection:
I am the manifestation of the forces of nature coming together. Consisting of soul, mind, and body, I have been given life.
What is life? Life is that segment of eternity during which my soul, mind, and body join to interact with the universe. It is commonly understood as the time that I am born to the moment of my death.
How long will life be I can never know. But my body, with the instinct for survival, will seek to extend it as long as possible. My mind, on the other hand, understands that my time here is limited and, through its power of will, strives to make life as full as possible. Meanwhile, my soul, having its origin in the eternal universe, concerns itself with neither longevity nor activity. In its essence of love, the soul endeavors to experience the joy of life.
At the moment that the forces of the universe brought together the elements of my being--soul, mind, and body--they also set me on a path of life filled with joy and success. The events and experiences of my life determine whether or not I remain on course.
My view of life and attitude toward what happens to me are formed by my experiences and teaching, both formal and informal. My outlook on life may be influenced by others who themselves do not understand life. I can learn from their experiences, but I must develop my own outlook.
It is my life. It is the only one I have. I will get the most out of it by experiencing it through body, mind, and soul.
Reflect also on: Abundance, Joy, Mind, Soul, Success.
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ABUNDANCE
It is contentment in yourself, not the content of your things, from which life's abundance springs.
In a family of twelve children--my mother had two, my dad had three, and they married and had seven together--there were times in my childhood when bread was the only thing that I could find to eat. My siblings would butter theirs, but I did not like butter. I would sprinkle my two slices of bread with water to hold the sugar that would make my sweetened sandwich.
Years later looking at the situation, I would say we were poor. But I did not think that then. Poverty and wealth are comparative measurements of what one possesses and I had nothing with which to compare my life. Though the sugar-sandwich days were few, I had no way of knowing that they were not an ordinary occurrence which all families encountered. I had no knowledge of what others had or did not have that was different than mine. At the time, a sugar sandwich satisfied me.
Upon reflection:
I have heard the pessimistic expression "Life is not a bowl of cherries", but I refuse to adopt this cynicism as a premise of life. There are times when indeed life seems difficult, not at all cherry-like, but I believe that it is supposed to be like a bowl of cherries. My life is supposed to be a bowl of deep red, juicy, sweet cherries. I can live in abundance.
There is no end to the joy that I can experience and no limit to the successes which I can achieve.
When my bowl is not full, I go cherry picking believing that I am entitled to more. When the cherries seem to be sour, I readjust my focus and find the sweetness that is in life. When it appears that I get only the pits, I make sure that I am not letting someone else control my life.
Abundance is not a function of the volume of tangible objects I manage to amass. Those material things are immaterial when measuring the fullness of life. Neither the square footage of my living quarters nor the size of my bank account is determinative. What stock I hold or the percentage of the business that I own are not indicative of abundance. It is possible for me to own much but find little joy in what I hold.
I live in abundance when I love myself and those around me, find joy in what I do, and am satisfied that I am fulfilling my purpose in life.
Reflect also on: Joy, Life, Money, Success.
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SUCCESS
You can find success in the journey as well as in the destination when you take the path that leads through your heart.
I have a bachelor's degree from Yale University and a law degree from the University of Southern California. I have worked continuously since completing school and have experienced an increase in my income each year. I own a business. I am happily married and enjoy my four children.
Am I successful? Yes, I am. But I do not judge my success by the degrees I hold, by my social status, or by my material possessions. Nor do I measure my success by comparing what I have to what my neighbor has. I judge myself to be successful because of what I feel inside.
Upon reflection:
The common gauges for measuring success are wealth, fame, and rank. But wealth without joy is not success. Fame without love is not success. Rank without peace is not success.
Success is more than the attainment of my goals or the achievement of my objectives. Coupled with the reaching of my ambitions must be the satisfaction of my innermost desires. I must fulfill my purpose in life. From this fulfillment will spring joy that flows into all that I do. I will have reason to love myself and my loving spirit will radiate to others. Abundance of life is emotional well-being along with the achievement of success.
To be successful is to be confident that I can and will succeed at the things that I attempt and to be content with what I achieve. That confidence and contentment cannot be quantified in dollars. I can be successful with a net worth of ten thousand as well as with a million. I am no less successful if my name is known only in my own household as when my name is a household word.
The way to success is most often depicted as a difficult journey. A struggle up a steep, rugged, unpaved, and lonely road. I will struggle to succeed if I set my goals in terms of what others possess or have accomplished. Not everyone can be a millionaire. Everyone cannot be famous. Only one person at a time can be the president. But if my goal is to be happy, to be loved and loving, and to be physically and mentally healthy, I can achieve success with little difficulty. Love, joy, and peace can be had by everyone.
Reflect also on: Abundance, Failure, Joy, Succeed.
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JOY
When what you do and strive to be are in harmony with your soul, joy will fill your life.
There are notable events in my life that filled my heart with joy. Completing high school, graduating from Yale, passing the bar exam, marrying Jacqueline, and witnessing the birth of each of my four children were memorable moments of joy.
And there are on-going events which bring about the same emotion as those special times. My heart is warmed each time a person from the audience tells me that something I said had a positive effect on him or her. When I learn that my life has inspired another to find fullness of life, I am glad. Witnessing the accomplishments of a friend or a family member is joyous. I strive to experience joy not just in special events but in the living of each day.
Upon reflection:
Joy is not simply a transient feeling that comes and goes with a specific event. It is a pervasive emotion that illuminates life. When I am joyful, the feeling is deep in my soul and its presence is evident in my thoughts and can be seen on my face.
Joy is an immediate effect of love. It can be experienced only when I allow love to flow freely. When I act and interact in love, I will experience an inimitable feeling that is bright and warm and sweet. That is joy which makes life's journey a pleasant one. By contrast, joy cannot be present if hatred and dislike dominate my soul.
It is the law of the eternal universe that joy be the natural emotional state of my being. When it is, I not only can have the abundance of life, but I will experience life's fullness. Though events will occur which will make me sorrowful, my predominant joyful nature will cause healing of my emotional injury. The feeling of joy will soon return.
I can choose whether or not to live in joy. If joy is not my natural emotional state, I can experience momentary feelings of happiness, but those feelings will come and go with specific events. I will be driven by stimuli of physical pleasure or satisfaction in an effort to obtain a fix of happiness.