His Soldier, His Lover
Smashwords edition
Copyright 2012 by Toby Graham
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All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the author or publisher except for the use of brief quotations in critical articles or reviews.
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This is a work of fiction. Names, places, business, characters and incidents are the product of the author's imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons living or dead, actual events or locales is coincidental.
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His Soldier, His Lover
One of the very first things Blake had told Stephen was he had ambitions of being a soldier, of fighting for his home and country. Stephen heard it, of course, but the implications had been placed on the back burner in his mind, replaced instead by visions of Blake's dark eyes and olive skin, the way his hair tickled the wind, the way his lips would part just slightly before he planned on swooping in for a kiss. Their time together was full of passion and life, a vitality neither had felt before.
It was easy to lose yourself, and as Blake packed up his luggage on that last night – the night before his deployment to lord only knows where, some city in the Middle East – Stephen could only stand in the doorway of their bedroom and let tears stream quietly down his cheeks.
We spent almost every waking moment together, he thought to himself, watching Blake stuff articles of clothing into his cases. How could it have all gone by so fast?
Blake, ever the brick, was keeping his mind on the task at hand. He had to pack. He had stalled it for as long as he could, put it off as long as time would allow. Procrastination was no longer an option, and as much as he wanted to join Stephen in the doorway, to take him into his thick arms and hold him until the morning, he had to make sure this was done. He had to make sure everything was ready. His focus on shifting items into his cases was the only thing keeping the flood gates shut, and he feared what would happen if he were to pause, even for a second.
It wasn't like he was having second thoughts. Being a soldier was all he ever wanted out of life, and it was a goal he was very much on his way to attaining without any trouble or hesitation – until Stephen came along. Stephen changed everything, and Blake almost hated him for it. His charm, his innocence, his painfully cute smile, his boyish laugh, his sense of humor, his lithe body. Blake thought being a soldier was everything he wanted, until he met Stephen and realized there was even more to want.
Still, his decision to become a soldier and fight for his country was one he couldn't put on hold. He had dreamed about it for too long, wanted it too much. Blake was a man of remarkable strength, a man of courage, a man of fortitude and character. Above all, though, Blake was a soldier.
Getting Stephen to understand that had been painful but necessary. They fought. They made up. They'd spend a night apart, only to find themselves rushing into each other's arms the next morning. Stephen would cry into Blake's chest, ask him why he had to go, why he had to fight, why he had to be a soldier – and Blake would simply cradle him, hold him tight and let him go on until he was calm again. They talked about it countless times, and eventually Stephen had come to accept the idea. Still, his acceptance was not without reservation, and as he stood in the doorway of their bedroom watching Blake close the zipper on one of his two cases he couldn't help but think about all the time they would be missing.