OTHER E-BOOKS IN THIS SERIES
‘How to achieve what you want when you want’
7 powerful principles of successful thinking for work, life and everything
by Andy Gilbert, this FREE 33 page e-book is packed with ideas and tips on the 7 principles of successful thinking. It contains 8 top tips to help you define your goals, 5 steps to help you plan your priorities and yet more tips on strengthening your self-belief, how to involve others more successfully and how to make choices. Put into action immediately these ideas will greatly increase your probability of achieving what you want, when you want.
Each of our powerful principles of successful thinking is also the subject of a separate e-book, giving more detail and more tips to help you.
To obtain your copy of this FREE e-book simply visit www.gomadthinking.com
THINKING PRINCIPLE ONE
‘How to develop a personal passion’
Practical tips to increase your motivation to achieve
by Andy Gilbert & Annagail Davies, explains thinking principle one of our Solution Focused Thinking System in greater depth. As well as discovering how to avoid blaming others, you’ll also get great tips on how to increase your motivation to achieve and save yourself masses of time in the process!
THINKING PRINCIPLE THREE
‘How to produce plentiful possibilities, pressing priorities and perfect plans’
Quick and easy tips to plan your success and get you started
by Andy Gilbert & Ken Hudson, gives you some quick and easy steps to plan your success and get you started. With tips to eliminate time wasting, generate loads of ideas and produce a plan that will work for you, it will help you make your goal come to life and stay alive!
THINKING PRINCIPLE FOUR
‘How to create a self-belief that you can and will achieve’
Powerful insights into building the confidence to succeed
by Andy Gilbert & Graham Field, expands on Henry Ford’s famous quote “Whether you believe you can do a thing or not, you are right." It gives a powerful insight into just how much we are governed by limiting beliefs, and how we can harness the power of our minds to achieve so much more than we ever dreamed possible.
THINKING PRINCIPLE FIVE
‘How to get others on your side’
Definitive guidelines on involving others to achieve what you want
by Andy Gilbert & Caron Lindley, gives an explanation of the five types of people that you can involve to help you achieve your goal. Research has shown that the bigger your goal, the better your chances of success if you involve others to help. If you only ever involve the people closest to you, then this e-book is for you!
THINKING PRINCIPLE SIX
‘How to make personal choices and take responsibility’
Insightful ideas to help you own your thoughts and actions
by Andy Gilbert & Ken Hudson, takes a hard look at responsibility and its consequences. Personal responsibility lies at the heart of our Solution Focused Thinking System. Without it the system collapses. Without it, you are missing out on success, respect and leadership. It even promises to be liberating!
THINKING PRINCIPLE SEVEN
‘How to guarantee success’
Clear and simple tips on taking action and measuring results
by Andy Gilbert & Rob Smith, is a hard-hitting finale to the seven key principles of Solution Focused Thinking. As well as challenging your thinking, and challenging you to put it all into practice, there is valuable advice on measuring goals, especially difficult-to-measure things like ‘confidence’. Plus an invitation for you to choose to make a difference.
‘The Making A Difference Workbook’
30 activities and exercises for successful thinking about work, life and everything
by the Go MAD Team, is an essential guide to help you put into practice successful thinking. The workbook is structured to allow you to think through key issues and turn them into practical applications that you can put to use immediately. It will help you take a step closer to what you want to achieve.
To order any of the above e-books, simply visit www.gomadthinking.com
CONTENTS
Page
Introduction 5
6 ways that this e-book will help you
1. Congratulations! You are already successful! 6
2. Decide to be more than average 6
Recognise how you already define goals each day
3. Define your own success 7
What does success mean to you
4. How to link success with personal happiness 8
5. Decide what you want 9
What to do if you don’t know what you want
6. The dreaded ‘but how’ syndrome 10
7. Recognise the givens 10
Focus on what you can change
8. Leap into the top 5% of goal-definers! 11
Develop goal defining skills
9. Commit to what you want to achieve 13
10. How to be more specific 14
Tips on defining your goals
11. Seven more tips on writing goals 14
12. How to brainwash yourself to achieve your goal 16
More best use of your sub-conscious mind
13. Ready, steady, brainwash! 17
Programming your mind with goals
14. What’s the use in worrying? 18
15. Filter out negative thoughts 19
16. Develop clarity 20
17. Use your imagination 20
Build a picture of what you want to achieve
18. Your turn to imagine 22
19. Decide your own goals 23
How to avoid comparing yourself to others
20. How to eat an elephant 24
The art of developing sub-goals
21. Breaking down your SMART goal 25
Consider if you need sub-goals
22. Make sure your goals fit together 25
23. Get the goal-defining habit! 25
6 tips to help you
24. When to extend or amend your goal 27
25. Learning summary 28
26. Extra tips from our goal-defining booklet 28
27. Where to go from here 29
Liability disclaimer
The material contained in this e-book is general and is not intended as advice on any particular matter. Go MAD Research & Consulting Group and the author expressly disclaim all and any liability to any person whatsoever in respect of anything done by any person in reliance, whether in whole or in part, on this e-book. Please take appropriate legal advice before acting on any information in this e-book.
INTRODUCTION
Welcome to ‘How to determine what you want and when you want it’. This e-book is designed to help you define and make sense of your goals. It follows on from the first e-book in this series ‘How to develop a personal passion’. This explained the first of the seven key thinking principles in the Go MAD Solution Focused Thinking System – your reason why or motivation for doing things. This e-book concentrates on the second thinking principle, which is all about defining your goal. If you haven’t read ‘How to develop a personal passion’, don’t worry. You’ll still get some great tips and techniques from this e-book!
Take
Action
Involve
Others Self
Belief Personal Responsibility
Plan Priorities Define
Goal Reason
Why
Go MAD Framework
This book brings to mind the 1990’s hit record by the Spice Girls ‘Wannabe’. The first line brilliantly depicts the first two principles and the link between them. It goes “I’ll tell you what I want, what I really, really want”.
‘What I want’ is the goal that you want to achieve (thinking principle two). Adding ‘what I really, really want’ indicates the strength and passion of the reason why for wanting this goal, which is a sound foundation to have before moving forwards. Unfortunately the Spice Girls spoilt things a bit with the next line (‘Zigaziga ha’) rather than moving to principle three – but that’s another story!
This e-book will help you:
Define exactly what it is you want to achieve
Enable you to explain easily what you want to others
Set a firm foundation for things you want to make a difference about
Increase your self-belief that you can achieve it
Make it easier to establish priorities
Rise to the top 5% of goal definers!
But in case you believe you haven’t any goals or don’t need them, read on!
1. Congratulations! You are already successful!
I realise that, for some people, the word goals can be a turnoff. You don’t have to use this word! During our 4000 hours of research into the successful thinking principles that help people to make a difference, many people referred to: targets, specific objectives, well-formed outcomes, having an end in mind, the destination or simply knowing what they wanted. Some even referred to it as the thing I’m after. To get on in life, you will have developed goal-defining habits. If you have ever travelled on holiday or set out for a destination, you have experienced moving towards a goal.
“I don’t think about goals” stated someone on a recent training programme, “I like to go on holiday and do nothing – just to drift around and enjoy life”. I resisted the temptation of asking him how he had managed to get his flight or set off on time, without having a goal of doing so. Instead, I helped him to realise that each year he successfully achieved his goal of deliberately being in an environment and creating a state of mind that allowed him to relax and do what he wanted. He had, in fact, made a difference from being in his normal pressurised working environment and, without realising it, successfully applied all seven Solution Focused Thinking Key Principles.
"Our plans miscarry because they have no aim. When a man does not know what harbour he is making for,
no wind is the right wind."
Seneca
The average person does not have well-defined personal goals. It is commonly stated, in many books, that only 3-5% of the population have written goals. By the end of this e-book you will have an understanding of goal defining skills. If you apply these skills with the other key thinking principles, you could seriously affect your success in a positive way. Remember you will never achieve more than you set out to achieve. Most people aim at nothing and hit it with incredible accuracy. Decide to be successful by developing written goals.
“Minds are like parachutes - they only function when open.”
Thomas Dewar
What is the meaning of success? The answer to this question depends upon the meaning you give to it. Before you go any further, take a piece of paper, write down what you understand by the word ‘success’.
When I use this exercise with groups, the two words most commonly used in definitions (by 60-70% of people) are achievement and goals. I find this somewhat ironic, bearing in mind the much smaller percentage who make the effort to define written personal goals. Maybe this is why so many individuals do not consider themselves to be successful!
My favourite definition is the one given by Earl Nightingale who spent over 30 years researching and broadcasting success principles:
“Success is the progressive realisation of a worthwhile goal, or the pursuit of a worthy ideal.”
You determine what you consider to be worthwhile or a worthy ideal, depending on your core values and the strength of your reason why (look back at the ‘How to develop a personal passion’ e-book for more explanation of this).
“I would rather be ashes than dust! I would rather that my spark should burn out in a brilliant blaze than it should be stifled by dry rot. I would rather be a superb meteor, every atom of me in magnificent glow, than a sleepy and permanent planet. The proper function of man is to live, not to exist. I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them.
I shall use my time.”
Here is an example of a personal goal aligned to core values and a strong reason why:
Last year I was talking with John, aged 33, whose core values are based upon economic security for himself and his family. He was totally focused on the goal “At 50 years of age I will be financially secure and retire!” Successfully pursuing a career in the banking and finance sector, John had great self-belief in his own abilities and the achievability of his goal; had involved others in the detailed planning of his financial and career priorities, and was taking responsibility for making it happen.
4. How to link success with personal happiness
Achieving the goal or getting the end result is a measure of success; unfortunately it is often mistaken for the only measure. The journey towards the end goal might be made up of several sub-goals and milestones of achievement. If success is the progressive realisation of a worthwhile goal, why not set out to enjoy the journey as well as the destination?
“When we are motivated by goals that have deep meaning, by dreams that need completion, by pure love that needs expressing, then we truly live life.”
Greg Anderson
For some, the end result is all that matters; for others, the process of getting there is equally, if not more, important. I regularly come across individuals who are looking forward to their retirement date from work. I often hear them discussing what they will do: “When I retire in… years time”. Incredibly, this end goal of retirement varies from a few months to over twenty years! If happiness is a measure of success, how successful will they have been in the progressive realisation of their goal?
“If you have a goal in life that takes a lot of energy, that requires a lot of work, that incurs a great deal of interest and that is a challenge to you, you will always look forward to waking up to see what the new day brings.”
Susan Polis Schultz
Doing what you enjoy and consider to be worthwhile, will increase your happiness. Deciding what you want and working towards your goals are steps towards meeting your definition of personal success.
Goals will help to determine your actions; your actions will impact on the results. Goals give you a direction and a focus for the things you want to achieve.
Imagine a ship setting out to sail without determining a destination or direction. There would be no progress; it would drift out to sea, bumping into obstacles as it bobbed around. Think about people that you know who are perhaps in a similar situation!
Occasionally I get asked, “How can I decide goals when I don’t know what I want?” I have discovered four main methods of doing this successfully:
Imagine that you do know what you want
Go back to key thinking principle one and examine your core values and strength of reason why
Decide a specific time by which you will have decided what you want, i.e. set a goal about defining another goal
Explore your hopes and dreams: consider your ruts and circumstances.
If you want to make a difference, focus on defining your desired outcome. What do you want to have, do or become? Where do you want to be in one year’s time? Five years’ time? Ten years’ time?
It will probably help you to focus on three main areas:
What do you want to have or acquire? (material goals)
What do you want to do? (activity goals)
What do you want to become? (developmental goals)
It can be useful to write down a list of these things, as this will help you move forward. Whilst the first two types of goal are fairly straightforward to understand, the third might need further explanation. It includes goals about developing skills and knowledge, gaining experience, improving personal behaviour or relationships, and increasing effectiveness. So that you can achieve your material and activity goals you might first need to think about how you can develop yourself.
“The trouble with not having a goal is that you can spend your life running up and down the field and never score.”
Bill Copeland
6. The dreaded ‘but how’ syndrome
You should be careful of the ‘Yes, but how?’ syndrome. This is a common and deadly disease that all too often kills goals before they are fully defined. For example:
I want to develop new skills.
Yes, but how do I make the time?
I want to increase my income.
Yes, but how?
I want to…
Yes, but how is someone like me going to achieve that?
The ‘Yes but how?’ syndrome can be contagious. It is quite quickly spread from the mouth of one person to the ears of another. If it is not immediately diagnosed, it will kill an idea before a strong enough reason why can be found and a goal defined.
Thinking about how to achieve something before fully defining exactly what the goal is, causes most people to give up before really starting. “There’s no point in setting a goal, because I can’t see how to get there.” If only life was that easy and predictable! Focus on the why and the what (thinking principles one and two) and leave the how (principles three to seven of solution focused thinking) for later.
“Life's up and downs provide windows of opportunity to determine your values and goals. Think of using all obstacles as stepping stones to build the life you want.”
Marsha Sinetar
7. Recognise the givens
It is important to consider the price you are prepared to pay to achieve your goal. What are you willing to do more of? What are you willing to stop doing or do less of? The answers to these questions should give you an idea of the strength of your reason why. With this in mind, consider how much you believe you can realistically control or directly influence the desired outcome. The circle on the next page shows a way of looking at things that are going on in your life.
THE
GIVENS 1
2
Things
I can influence and want to
change
Things
that concern me, but are outside of my control or influence
Things
I am not really bothered about
Focus your energy on the things you can influence and make a difference about (triangle 1). Recognise that some things exist that cannot be changed (triangle 2). It’s pointless moaning about bad weather or being stuck in a traffic jam – they are both givens. You can’t change either of them, but you can make a difference by choosing how to respond to the givens.
In any organisation, there will always be certain rules and procedures. Some of these can probably be improved for the benefit of all; others will be givens. Examples might include Government and European legislation, working terms and conditions, legal contracts, and safety procedures. In seeking to make a difference, accept what you cannot change and change what you cannot accept.
“Never look down to test the ground before taking your next step; only he who keeps his eye fixed on the far horizon will find his right road.”
Dag Hammarskjold
Yes, it is important to have your goals written down. Research has shown that people with written defined goals achieve much better results than those who don’t. Writing goals down is evidence of really going for what you want to achieve. It starts the process of moving an idea in the mind, from your imagination to the external reality. What will really get you into the top 5% of goal-definers, however, will be the clarity of your goal.
A well-written goal gives detail and clarity of direction. There are some important steps in writing goals that need to be taken. First, you must develop the ability to turn a vague aim into a specific, measurable goal.
When I became the President of a local voluntary organisation for one year, there were many things I wanted to do, such as increasing membership, successful community projects and successful training programmes. However, with hindsight I realise that these were aims and not goals. So, what is the difference?
Goals are specific in their detail; whereas aims are vague. In my example I was not specific about what sort of or how many new members I wanted and what the membership at the end of the year would be. I was not specific about what ‘successful’ projects or training programmes looked like.
Goals are measurable in either time, cost, quantity or quality; whereas aims cannot be measured. In my examples I could not measure the results because I had not been specific. A ‘successful’ project, for example, might have been to raise a certain amount of money, which could have been the measure.
You have to believe that the goal is achievable within the time-scale you decide. For a goal to be achievable, you must believe there is at least a 50% probability of success. This is linked with self-belief, Solution Focused Thinking Principle Four, which is the subject of another e-book in the series ‘How to create a self-belief that you can and will achieve’. I had a strong belief that we could be successful, but since I hadn’t been very specific, my belief could easily have wobbled.
Goals should be relevant and related to a strong underlying reason why. Aims often tend to be more wishful thinking. Early on in my Presidential year, we had a talk about personal development planning. We were asked to close our eyes and conjure up an image of where we would be in a year’s time. As I closed my eyes, I saw myself walking onto a stage collecting two prestigious awards on behalf of our local organisation, one national and one international. I knew now precisely that I had two goals: one for each award. Everything else I did during that year now became a sub-goal, and the awards became my motivation to keep going. My reason why was strong and simple – they would provide the motivation, the impetus and a solid foundation for the relatively new local organisation to move into the future with confidence with next year’s President.
Goals have time-scales to measure what will be achieved by a certain date. Aims often have vague time-scales or none at all. My time-scale at least had been set, since I was only President for one year.
At the end of the year we did indeed win both awards and others besides. In fact I went on to win the national award three years in a row.
“You must have long-term goals to keep you from being frustrated by short-term failures.”
Charles C. Noble
There are many books that refer to goal defining and most use the acronym SMART to describe best practice.
Specific
Measurable
Achievable
Relevant
Time-scales
Knowing what SMART means and having the ability to write SMART goals are two different things. Many of the managers who attend our development programmes have often heard of SMART goals and can recite what each letter stands for. However, I reckon that less than 20% can actually write a SMART goal in a single sentence.
It is now your chance to write a SMART goal in a single sentence. Choose something relevant to your reason why; something that you believe is achievable within a certain time-scale, and state specifically the measurable difference you want to make. Print this out and write it here, or write it separately in a notebook. If it helps, do what I was asked to do: close your eyes and see yourself in a year’s time. What have you achieved?
|
My SMART goal (first draft)
|
In the following few pages, you will find extra tips and ideas about working on your goal to increase your probability of success.
Defined goals focus only on the what. Remember to leave the how for later; there is no need to include it in a written goal.
Amend any of the following words you have included in your written goal:
|
improved |
- |
specify a measurable improvement |
|
better |
- |
specify how much better |
|
more |
- |
specify how much more |
|
less |
- |
specify how much less |
|
feel |
- |
specify what you will feel |
|
wish |
- |
state what will happen |
|
learn |
- |
specify what will be the outcome of the learning |
|
understand |
- |
specify what will be the outcome of the understanding |
A good check of how specific you have written your goal is to notice which of your five senses you will be using to measure your success. What will you be able to see, hear, feel/touch, taste or smell by your specified date that is a measurable difference? Being able to actually see yourself doing something can act as powerful motivation as well as making your goal into a really clear picture.
I often ask participants in programmes to write a SMART goal about what they want to achieve by the end of the day. It’s great when we eventually do this and write a goal something like “By 4pm today I will have written down two ideas that will help me to increase the levels of customer service in my team”.
Tip One: Write your goal as a single sentence
Your goal must state specifically what it is you want and only contain one task. If the word ‘and’ appears you may have two goals which will both need to be defined and written down separately. If the goals are not separated there is a chance that you might only achieve part of your goal, which may de-motivate you.
Tip Two: Avoid vague time-scales
E.g. ‘by the end of the year’ or ‘during March’. Use definite time-scales to measure what will be achieved by when. This gives you a focus, something to work to and gives you a sense of satisfaction as you progress to and then achieve your goal. E.g. By 22nd December 2006…
Tip Three: Give your goal a newspaper headline
Newspapers have specific dates, and it is good to write your goal as the ‘headline’. It will be precise, captured in a single sentence.
Tip Four: Motivate yourself to achieve.
If it helps, you may like to make your smart goals SMARTER, where the E = exciting and the r = recording them.
Tip Five: Ask yourself questions
Help your mind to work with you about what you specifically want to achieve. This will encourage your subconscious mind to take note of the information. You can do this by asking yourself simple goal defining questions:
What do I want to do?
By when?
What is the reason that this is important to me?
How will I know when I have achieved it?
Tip Six: Write your goals in the positive
Your mind can’t tell the difference between the positive and the negative. For example, if you are aiming to lose weight, focus on the weight you want to achieve rather than the weight you want to lose. This will help you to keep thinking about what you want rather than what you don’t want.
Tip Seven: Convert % into figures
Again it helps the mind to focus on actual figures rather than percentages. If you want to increase sales by 20%, what does that mean in terms of actual money?