-A-
Attrition:
Definition from Business School:
Diminishing in
number due to stress
Real
World Business Context:
“I know, this employee attrition has crippled our workforce and force everyone to do more with less. By the way, can you help move my stuff into the corner office?”
Actionable:
MBA Definition:
Capable of being acted on
Real World Business Context:
“When I asked you to start with the items that are actionable, I expected you to call our media contacts, not call dibs on the last cupcake.”
Architect:
Definition from Business School:
Arranges parts to build
Real World Business Context:
“I did not find it funny that one of you changed the PowerPoint so that my role went from the ‘Architect of the Merger’ to ‘Director of Inappropriate ‘Reply All’.”
-B-
Base (as in lets touch base):
MBA Definition:
To make contact with
Real World Business Context:
“Why don’t you get started on that and we’ll touch base when you’re not an idiot.”
Best
practices:
MBA Definition:
A procedure that has proven thru experience to lead to the best result
Real World Business Context:
“Cutting costs is obviously the best practice but I’d rather fund this with your salary.”
Blue sky thinking:
MBA Definition:
Brainstorming ideas that are completely new and unrelated to ideas previously thought of
Real World Business Context:
“I don’t think that’s legal but damnit I respect that kind of blue sky thinking.”
Benchmark:
MBA Definition:
Creation of a standard which can be used to measure
Real World Business Context:
“We’ll be using an
entry level salary as our benchmark, and pay you much less.”
Biobreak:
MBA Definition:
A short break during a meeting
Real World Business Context:
“Ok I’m going to need a quick biobreak to tweet about you guys.”
Brick
and mortar:
MBA Definition:
The actual physical location of a business
Real World Business Context:
“There isn’t much capital left for the brick and mortar but that sounds like more of an accounting problem.”
-C-
Circle
back:
MBA Definition:
Return to an issue at a later time
Real World Business Context:
“We’ve hit a bit of a roadblock here, let’s circle back after some chimichangas.”
Core
competency:
MBA Definition:
The main strength of a business
Real World Business Context:
“I’m hearing a lot about our research department and our aggressive lending, but I’m pretty sure our core competency is me.
Connectivity:
MBA Definition:
The ease of flow of information through an organization
Real World Business Context:
“80% of our connectivity is in the form of ‘what’s up MFer?’ IMs from Henry.”
Change agent:
MBA Definition:
Person who brings about change in an organization
Real World Business Context:
“We’re bringing in a consultant to this group who is known for being a change agent, because there isn’t much about you guys that we like right now.”
Cost center:
MBA Definition:
Part of an organization that creates expenses but does not add to profit
Real World Business Context:
“If only we had listened to their recommendations we wouldn’t be in this mess. That being said, they are a cost center and I’ll be downsizing half their staff anyway.”
Cannibalize:
MBA Definition:
Decrease the demand for an existing product by releasing a new and similar product
Real World Business Context:
“This inferior product we are launching does cannibalize sales of our superior product, but I’m moving forward unrelated to the manufacturer throwing in a ‘business trip’ for me.”
Chest thumping:
MBA Definition:
Boasting and claiming territory
Real World Business Context:
“Eh, sounds like a bunch of chest-thumping to me. Call me when you have a subpoena.”
Click and mortar:
MBA Definition:
Online services of a business
Real World Business Context:
“She’s been working on the backend of our click and mortar for three months now, and I still don’t know what ‘backend’ means.”
-D-
Drop
the ball:
MBA Definition:
Fail to perform as expected
Real World Business Context:
“This isn’t your fault. I really dropped the ball by hiring you.”
Deliverable:
MBA Definition:
An end point used for project management purposes
Real World Business Context: