Knitting with Hospital Gloves
The How-To Guide for Becoming Instant Caregivers
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Karen J Rinehart
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Copyright 2011 by Karen J Rinehart
Smashwords Edition
Cover Design by Brian Maher, BZA.com
Introduction: Your Phone Rings and It All Begins
Chapter 1 - Getting There ASAP/Finding a Flight. Fast
Chapter 3 - Prepare for What You Might See Upon Arrival
Chapter 4 - Camping Out at the Hospital, including Caregiver Essentials
Chapter 6 - Siblings/Other Family Members: How to Avoid Conflict
Chapter 7 - Well Meaning Friends and Neighbors: How to Let Them Help You and Your Family
Chapter 8 - Finding and Utilizing Local Help (Support) for You and Your Patient
Chapter 9 - Spreading the Word (Communication with the Outside World)
Chapter 10 - Traveling Back and Forth as an On-Going Caregiver: Now What?
Chapter 11 - A Few Surprisingly Positive Sides to Being an Instant Caregiver
Chapter 12 - Hindsight From Fellow Instant Caregivers
Chapter 13 - Additional Resources
Print and Use Checklist: Packing for the Plane
Print and Use Checklist: What You'll Want to Have at the Hospital for You
This book is dedicated to you, the present and future Instant Caregivers of the world.
P.S. Don't forget to pack your Strongest Spine and Sense of Humor.
And in memory of Harry E. Rinehart, who trusted me in his most vulnerable times. I am forever grateful and humbled.
Introduction: Your Phone Rings and It All Begins
"Karen? It's Mom. Dad got out of heart surgery okay but then crashed in the recovery room. They've taken him back into surgery to open his chest again. They don't know if he's going to make it…."
"Catie? It's Dad. The ambulance just took your mom to the hospital. She couldn't breathe. She's in the ICU…"
It's likely your role as Instant Caregiver will begin with a phone call like these real-life scenarios. There is no way to prepare—who wants to think about such things?—but we must—because at some point, we're all going to be thrown into this role.
I do hope you're reading this long before you get that call—but if you're packing your bags, in the airport or hospital waiting room, know that you can do this. You can! I'm in your corner walking you through this.
While I'd flown to my parents' house in the past to help them in "medical" situations like my mom's planned foot and shoulder surgeries—it was nothing to prepare me for taking care of them during an unexpected, life or death situation.
Many of us will find ourselves unprepared and possibly intimidated when dealing with medical professionals and the hospital setting. If we've not spent time in one, hospitals can be very unnerving, intimidating and confusing to navigate. Add stress and uncertainty to the mix and those feelings intensify.
I know you'll have a roller coaster of emotions and thoughts, so I truly hope the advice in this guide helps you not only survive but also thrive in your new role as an Instant Caregiver.
Hopefully you're reading this before you get "The Call", because when it arrives, it plops one's brain on the Express Train to Dingbatville. I know, I've ridden that train more than once, and it does not have comfy sleeping cars or butler service. (Unless you count a free cup of ice water from the nurse's station.)
I became an Instant Caregiver the first time "in person" (the second time was via, "The Call"). We'd driven from North Carolina to Florida to spend a long weekend with my father-in-law. As was our tradition before we made the Sunday drive home, we went to lunch with Dad. In the middle of the restaurant doorway, my father-in-law turned gray and crumbled to the floor. Within minutes I experienced my first ride in an ambulance. For the first time medical professionals looked to me as the "responsible party" for anyone other than my own children. I was, those first few crucial hours, the sole family member present for the medical staff, my husband (via cell phone) and his dad. Without warning, I'd assumed the role of Instant Caregiver.
Dad was admitted to the hospital. The next day, my husband drove our kids back to North Carolina. Their PaPa was already up in arms that they missed one day of school for him! While my sister-in-laws scrambled to find others to cover their jobs and families, there I was, The Instant Caregiver, alone in the hospital with my father-in-law, with no idea how long either one of us would be there. It turned out to be weeks, with dad moving to the ICU where I continued my crash course in Caregiving 101, including the fine art of knitting while wearing hospital gloves (required garb in his room).
Several years later, The Phone Call came from my mother-- my dad was critically ill. It still felt Instant, challenging, scary, exhausting and surreal, but by then I was (as both a daughter and sister) far better prepared and more comfortable to step into the role of Instant Caregiver.
Read on as I share what I've learned during my tenure as an Instant Caregiver….
Tip #1 Getting There ASAP/ Finding a Flight. Fast
Many of us no longer live in the same town as our parents, let alone in-laws and extended family. Especially in an emergency, the distance requires flying rather than driving, which is why I'll focus on navigating the "friendly skies."
One way tickets
One-way tickets are so convenient and can be surprisingly inexpensive. On several occasions, when I had to change my return flights (count on this happening), I found it was cheaper for me to purchase a new one-way ticket instead of paying to change my original round trip flight.
For example, this past December 23rd, I booked a one-way Christmas day flight from Charlotte, NC to Chicago, IL for $90. My goal was to get to my aunt's hospital room as soon as possible but had no idea how long I needed to stay.
Flexibility is a luxury, but if you have it—like I did when returning from that Chicago trip—you can save a bundle. I flew home New Year's Day for $98. One day later the fare jumped to $298. This is handy to know and look into when you'll be traveling back and forth over an extended period of time. For example, many airline and travel sites will let you pick dates and locations then check the (or similarly worded) option, "My dates are flexible." This allows you to see the price of flights if you travel 1-3 days before or after your target dates and often save hundreds of dollars.
Airline regulations/change fees
Each airline has varying degrees of flight-change flexibility. And by flexibility I mean how much extra they'll charge to change your pre-purchased itinerary. For example, my cousin booked a roundtrip flight on Allegiant but paid an extra $15 upfront to avoid re-ticketing/change fees.