TABLE OF CONTENTS

FOREWORD by Richard Bandler & Paul McKenna

HOW TO USE THIS BOOK

INTRODUCTION

CHAPTER 1: I’m Having a Baby

CHAPTER 2: Childbirth

CHAPTER 3: Hypnosis

CHAPTER 4: Trance-forming Childbirth

CHAPTER 5: Birth Plan

CHAPTER 6: If the Baby is Breech

CHAPTER 7: When Baby is Ready to be Born

CHAPTER 8: Preparing your Mind and Body for Birth

CHAPTER 9: Your Body and Birth

CHAPTER 10: The Birth

CHAPTER 11: Home Birth

CHAPTER 12: Baby’s Experience-Prenatal Bonding

CHAPTER 13: Pregnancy from Dad’s Perspective

CHAPTER 14: The Birth Partner

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

REFERENCES

ONLINE REFERENCES

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Thank you to Dr. Richard Bandler, co-creator of NLP; whose life work with Hypnosis, NLP and DHE helped to make this book possible. He awoke within me a thirst for knowledge and continues to inspire me. Through his teaching my childbirth classes evolved, and from his suggestions this book evolved. I owe you so much thank you. My journey began many years ago with Dr. Richard Bandler, Paul McKenna and Michael Breen on an NLP Practitioner course and without these people I would never have considered the life that I live now nor believed the things that I accomplish on a day to day basis were possible.

Thank you too to Dr. Natheera Indrasenan and midwife Claire Singh who helped to ensure that my medical information was accurate; to my students over the years whose questions, experiences and testimonials helped to create the outline of this publication; and Jo, who helped in so many ways.

This book is for my family, my husband Steve, daughter Joey for their love and belief in me and of course my grandsons, Joshua and Logan; whose journey into this world contributed to this book.

FOREWORD

What can I say except bravo! I have for forty years created and taught ways to make life easier and better. Tina has brought hypnosis and my work to this very important event, childbirth. This book is a guide to making childbirth a wonderful event, reducing fear and pain, embracing creation. Her work here will truly be an asset both to mothers and those preparing mothers. Tina is one of my students who become a colleague, and now is making her own contribution to the future. She is a skilled NLP trainer, a master hypnotist, and has now refined her years of experience into a guide so many will use in the future. Please read, learn, and pass it on. I know she struggled to refine this volume to be both readable and useful, and I believe she has done both very well. I do warn the reader the skills and information may not just make child birth painless but may leak into the rest of their life resulting in unexpected pleasure. It has been with joy I see one of my students do so much, with the little I taught them.

Dr. Richard Bandler

Tina Taylor has written an excellent book for anyone expecting a baby. It’s a goldmine of techniques and helpful information. Tina’s years of experience and dedication to helping others have created a wonderful guide to making the experience of childbirth much easier.

Paul McKenna

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HOW TO USE THIS BOOK

This book is to be used as a guide by the mother to be, giving her exercises to practice for use prior to, during and after the birth of her child. Most women today have their baby’s father with them at the birth and some also have other family members and friends with them for support; within this book are techniques and suggestions that enable those supporting mum at the birth to help her achieve a more comfortable birth experience. Each chapter contains information that will be useful to the mother-to-be and her birth partners as well as exercises for them to practice.

These exercises use concepts from:

• NLP: Neuro Linguistic Programming®

• DHE: Design Human Engineering

• Hypnosis

NLP is the study of how we process information and how that affects our behaviour; or very simply how your brain works. By utilising NLP techniques you can take control of how you think. The way that we think of something, the words and pictures in our mind, create our feelings and behaviours. By learning how to change your thoughts you can change your feelings, get rid of anxieties, old beliefs, limitations that may have held you back in the past and create new more powerful beliefs that enable you to achieve your goals.

DHE contains the basic principles of NLP but whereas NLP is therapeutic and gives you techniques to fix things; DHE is a whole body/brain approach that enables you to build tools inside you mind that allow you to take control of what were thought of previously as processes out of your conscious control.

In the exercises you will be using your imagination, your five senses (seeing, hearing, feeling, tasting and smelling) learning on an unconscious level to develop breathing and visualisation techniques as well as relaxation techniques to be used during the birth.

Some of these exercises will require you to imagine, visualise certain situations; some people may think they are not visual, that they can’t see pictures in their mind.

We are all able to visualise, to imagine. Think about your bedroom, how is it decorated? What colour is your bedding, the curtains? Now imagine the room decorated in a completely different way, change all the furniture, black out the windows. What’s it like now?

To do this your mind formed some kind of image, a mental picture. Your mind creates pictures, all the time. When you think about where you parked your car, or what you did last weekend, your mind creates a mental picture. It's these mental pictures that contribute to our feelings.

As you practice the exercises regularly you will notice that not only are you developing skills for the birth but also for your day-to-day life. Whilst learning techniques that will enable you to achieve a more comfortable birth experience, they will also help you to become significantly more relaxed and confident during pregnancy; and during the birth of your child you will be able to access these resources as needed.

The key to success as with all things is to practice until these techniques become second nature to you. Practice is essential.

Whilst practicing these exercises remember each time you practice you are gaining in experience; the more that you practice the easier it becomes for you to relax. Some people find it takes practice to be able to relax deeply whereas others find it very easy to do. Many of my clients have very busy lives and are not used to spending time relaxing, they are often amazed at how easy it is for them to let go completely; and at how beneficial the relaxation process is for them during their pregnancy and also after the baby is born. There are many ways to relax, it's just a matter of finding what works best for you. Practice every day, as repetition is the key to success. Each time you practice this reinforces the process and so your ability to relax becomes easier.

Even if you are picking this book up late into your pregnancy and don’t have time to complete the plan you will still gain benefits from the techniques and exercises within this book.

These techniques can be used by you alone or with a birth partner, someone who will support you through the birth; your husband, partner, friend, sister, mother; they can all play a special part and help you during the birth.

In order for you to get the best from this book study the chapters on hypnosis and mind and body for birth and practice these techniques; then practice them some more and then practice more!

BIRTH STORY

Dear Tina

“ Thank you for the hypnosis session. Even though we only managed to have a couple of hours before Ben decided to pop into the world, I still found it incredibly helpful. The time we spent with you helped me to deliver using only a TENS machine for pain relief.

Thanks again for your help, it was the most useful of all the preparation I did (and I tried lots!).” --Sonia

Joshua & Logan January 2008; Logan at a few hours old.

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BIRTH STORY

Hi Tina

“I came to you as I had had 2 miscarriages and wanted to have a baby. Anyway I thought you’d like to know I just had my beautiful baby daughter at age 43 and she is perfect!

I purchased a copy of your Trance-forming Childbirth CD which I listened to (never actually heard because I kept falling asleep listening to it!) and it really helped! I had an entire day of full-blown contractions but absolutely no pain! I’m recommending your tape to my pre-natal friends in the hope that they too can have pain free contractions!

It's an amazing thing that the mind can overcome the stupid thoughts inadvertently and unhelpfully put there by well meaning people who should know better. Give us the positives as well as the tales of caution. The positives are what we need to cling to and what will heal us in the end.” --Susan

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INTRODUCTION

Whilst studying NLP and Hypnosis one of the things that intrigued me was the way that the mind creates our thoughts, beliefs and responses to situations, I was drawn to the minds ability to control various sensations or our perception of sensations and the sensation labeled pain. How is it that we have different “pain thresholds”; and that one persons pain can be another’s pleasure. This question brought my attention to childbirth and the fact that there are women in the world today that give birth within a few hours and then return to work with their babies swaddled to them. What is it that makes birth easy for some women and difficult for others?

I began to investigate these phenomena.

My studies led me to an English Doctor, Grantly Dick Read, who grew up in a rural area of England at the beginning of the 20th Century. Having seen animal husbandry at work he could not understand why humans had such a problem giving birth. He spent many years researching this. It is his theories and findings that contributed to my childbirth classes, together with a scientist, Dr. Candice Pert, who discovered that we all have opiate receptors in our brain. There is an area of your brain that ensures a chemical called endorphin, the body’s own natural opiate, is sent around the body where and when needed. This is your body’s own pain control mechanism. In fact we are all carrying our own chemistry set around inside of us, in our mind, and we are all quite capable of producing all the chemicals needed to run our bodies the way it was designed to. For example; as you are reading this text your mind is ensuring that your hormones are regulated, that your heart keeps on beating; if you bruise yourself, it heals automatically without thinking or trying your body knows exactly what to do; and women’s bodies ensure that the embryo receives everything needed so that it can develop and grow into a baby. All these things happen automatically without any conscious thought.

Our bodies and minds are capable of so much; perfectly designed and functioning (mostly) as they should and yet we seem to need a lot of assistance to do something that our bodies were originally designed to do. Like Dr. Grantly Dick Read, I wondered has it always been this way? How did our ancestors cope? I started off looking at today’s childbirth classes, particularly those run by local authorities in the UK, and found, that mostly, they have evolved into nothing more than an information group. Informing you of the medical choices that you have, the drugs available to you; explaining what happens if something goes wrong and also giving you information on the services available to you locally after the birth. Some of these courses even suggest that pain is inevitable, a part of your destiny, the price you pay for having a baby.

Yet for centuries Yogi’s in the east and practitioners of other disciplines have been able, to alter their state and perception of sensations, physical awareness. They are able to access an area within their mind and take control of their awareness threshold. It's as if their expectations and beliefs manage to eliminate discomfort.

How can the mind do this?

The breathing techniques used by Yogi’s, in meditation and for self-hypnosis are extremely powerful. By taking control of your breathing, slowing down the speed, taking deep breaths you change your brain waves. Each breath produces chemical changes in your brain and it is possible to achieve a change of physical awareness simply by moving your focus of attention to your breathing.

Most people today do not breathe efficiently and as a result use only a fraction of their lung capacity. When people are stressed or anxious they breathe from their chest taking rapid shallow breaths or worse they hold their breath. Without sufficient oxygen we can become fatigued. You can achieve a change of physical awareness simply by changing your breathing.

I began to wonder how could hypnosis be used to help women in childbirth?

In 2001 I ran my first childbirth class, initially helping a friend with the birth of her second child. The program I put together for her was devised from my studies and over the years this has been the template that I have used with my clients and for this book. Many of my clients have achieved a pain free experience whilst giving birth, whilst others have said that the techniques I taught them enabled them to have the natural birth they desired whilst being able to manage the demands of the birth process giving them a painless experience.

Hypnosis was used for pain control for operations and medical procedures before the discovery of chemical anesthesia; there are people today who have undergone open-heart surgery successfully using hypnosis instead of drugs as an anesthetic. There are also some great advantages to using hypnosis prior to or during an operation; it's said that patients who use hypnosis experience less blood loss and heal quicker. In the Magazine for Hypnosis and Hypnotherapy published in April 2006 Daniel Elkan stated, “The Liege team are discovering that hypno-sedation has some remarkable benefits. For a start patients bleed less. This makes surgery easier to perform)

In 2000 John F. Kihlstrom presented a paper regarding the effectiveness of hypnosis in surgery at the University of California; he concluded that, “It is effective, in that drugs plus hypnosis yield more pain relief than drugs alone. It is cost effective and it improves the quality of care.”

Women who used these techniques to relax prior to having a C Section have said how surprised the theatre staff were at the reduced blood loss through the procedure and at how quickly they healed with very little or in some cases no post operative discomfort.

These exercises and techniques have been taken from the experience gained during my therapy sessions, birthing courses and the birth of my two grandsons. Many of the ideas which are included here have originated from my studies and birthing classes. Wherever possible I have ensured that the proper accreditation is given and I would like to express my appreciation and gratitude to all those who helped by sharing their knowledge and experience’s. If I have missed an acknowledgement or reference then future editions will be edited to include the appropriate accreditation.

This book offers simple and straightforward instructions on how to use hypnosis during labour, to help you achieve a more comfortable birth experience.

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CHAPTER 1: I’m Having a Baby

You’ve received the results of the test. It's true; you're having a baby. What happens now? I wonder how you felt when you first realised the test was positive. So many different emotions: excited, happy, unbelieving maybe?

You’ve stated on a journey, one of the most amazing experiences if not the most amazing experience any woman can have. To conceive, carry and give birth to a new life, will evoke a number of feelings and emotions that you may never have felt before.

I’m sure most parents to be spend time thinking about this adventure, the new life they are producing and what it might be like to be parents. It’s a very special time, and your experience will be unique with each child. No matter how many children you have each birth is special, just as that child is unique, and will never be reproduced.

Your body is now in full swing working hard creating a new life and preparing for birth; whilst you begin to prepare for an addition to your family.

As soon as your pregnancy is confirmed you will be bombarded with information and advice from your doctor and midwives; then as you begin to announce your news you family, friends, and neighbours also have a few words of wisdom for you.

YOUR FIRST TRIMESTER 0-12 WEEKS

Your baby’s body and organs are formed by the end of the first 12 weeks, this is known as the first trimester. Now’s the time if you haven’t started already to make sure you look after yourself; get plenty of rest, eat a good balanced diet and if you are not doing so already begin to take folic acid supplements.

Once you have a positive pregnancy test make an appointment to see your doctor. In the UK at your first consultation with a midwife you will receive a form that entitles you to claim for free prescriptions and dental care during your pregnancy and up to a year after the birth. Your midwife will also arrange an appointment for your first scan at the hospital.

This is usually known as a dating scan and takes place between week 10 and 13 of your pregnancy. At this scan you will be able to see and hear your baby’s heartbeat, baby’s vital organs will be examined to see how they are developing and a few measurements will be taken to work out just how pregnant you are and when baby is likely to be born. Your midwife will have given you an estimated due date but these scans are considered to be more accurate and you may receive a different date from the sonographer.

SECOND TRIMESTER 13-28 WEEKS

During this trimester the changes begin to show; baby grows and people begin to notice your baby bump.

Between 12 – 20 weeks: you may be offered blood tests to screen for disorders such as Down’s syndrome after which you may be offered a diagnostic test such as amniocentesis or a detailed scan to confirm or reject the result. Your doctor and/or midwife will discuss this with you in more detail if needed to help you make the right decision for you.

At 20 weeks: you may be offered another scan of your baby to check baby’s head, limbs and organs, from this scan you may be able to tell the sex of your baby. If you would like to know the sex of baby ask the sonographer at your appointment.

At 24 weeks you should begin to think of your birth plan, and who you would like with you to assist you at the birth. A friend or relative with experience of childbirth would be a great asset and help for you and your birth partner(s).

THIRD TRIMESTER 29-48 WEEKS

If you are returning to work after baby is born this is a good time to start to consider your childcare options as you will be “a little busy” after baby is born; and you will probably want to visit nurseries to check out the facilities.

29 – 32 weeks: During this time go on a tour of the labour ward to familiarise yourself with the environment, and begin to think about what’s needed for baby. It is a good idea to check out your local hospital even if you are planning a home birth. Your midwife will explain that in the UK home births are advisable when babies are born between week 37 and week 42. For those babies that arrive earlier or later than this, it is recommended that you have your baby in hospital, so take a tour of the hospital so that you are aware of the facilities that are available to you.

33 – 36 weeks: Around this time you will become aware of your womb muscles tightening from time-to-time; these are 'Braxton Hicks' contractions, the muscles of your womb limbering up and getting ready for the birth.

37 – 40 weeks: make sure your hospital bags are packed – remember to include your birth plan and notes. If you are having a home birth make sure you are prepared (more details on this in the home birth chapter). Keep a list of vital phone numbers to hand for example: GP, midwife and labour ward.

FOOD TO MAKE A BABY

Many women make a few simple changes to their day-to-day habits to supply their body with the necessary ingredients to make a baby. The food that you eat whilst pregnant contains the only nutrients your baby will receive, baby literally becomes what you eat. When women crave certain foods this is because their bodies know what they need. When a good friend of mine, whose diet is mainly vegan, was pregnant and began to crave meat, at first she was shocked but by analysing her diet she realised that this was her bodies way of asking for more protein. She increased her protein intake, adding more pulses to her diet and the craving for meat disappeared.

To ensure you and baby remains healthy, be selective about what you eat. “Eating for two” does not mean eating twice as much but making sure you have a balanced diet, be careful about what you put into your body.

The food you eat also:

a) Provides strength and energy for you

b) Replaces worn out cells in your body

c) Helps regulate bodily functions

d) Maintains or improves the condition of your skin

e) Prepares your system for nursing.

It is important that you increase your protein intake. Protein is important for baby’s cell growth and development. Eat foods high in folic acid (raw, green, leafy vegetables) as a lack of folic acid can result in a type of anemia. You will also need to increase your calcium intake; the calcium you consume will help produce baby’s bones. Pregnant women can become deficient in iron, so make sure you have plenty of iron-rich foods. Try to have some food or drink containing vitamin C, such as fruit or vegetables or a glass of fruit juice, with any iron-rich meals as this may help your body absorb iron. If the iron level in your blood becomes low, your GP or midwife will advise you to take iron supplements.

If you are not used to eating a balanced diet, you may be thinking that it would be easier to take supplements from the beginning to ensure you are receiving all the essential nutriments, please check with your midwife or GP before you take any supplements to ensure that you are taking those that are safe for pregnancy.

Fasting: In some religions, fasting at certain times is important, however, most religions do not expect pregnant or breastfeeding women to fast. Talk to your spiritual adviser if you are worried about anything you should or shouldn’t be eating. You’ll probably find that the usual rules don’t apply in this special case.

If you are vegetarian or vegan, ensure that you eat plenty of foods rich in protein. You should be having two servings of protein a day. Talk to your midwife about the possibility of taking extra vitamin and mineral supplements.

If you haven’t already done so now is the time to stop smoking, drinking alcohol or using drugs, even some prescription drugs or those you can buy in the chemist are not healthy for baby. Remember to check with your doctor or pharmacist before you take anything throughout your pregnancy. Also be aware that not all natural and complementary therapies are safe in pregnancy. The Complementary Medical Association www.the-cma.org.uk will be able to advise you on which therapies are safe.

START NURTURING AND PROTECTING YOUR BABY

1) Stay hydrated. You’ll need extra fluids. Drink 6-to-8 glasses of water a day.

2) Protect your bump – sounds obvious but anything that puts you at risk of falling or hurting your bump should be avoided.

3) Exercise – gentle exercise will improve your circulation, raise oxygen levels in your blood and release endorphins, those feel good chemicals that will leave you and baby feeling on top of the world.

4) Avoid the forbidden foods. These are liver, pate, prepared salads (these may contain harmful bacteria), soft and mold-ripened cheeses. Also ensure that any meat is cooked through to ensure it's free of E.coli.

5) Ensure any eggs are cooked through to prevent the risk of salmonella and avoid foods containing raw or undercooked eggs like mayonnaise, ice cream, cheesecake or mouse.

6) Drink only pasteurised or UHT milk. Avoid unpasteurised goat or sheep milk and products made from it.

7) Reduce your caffeine intake. The recommended limit is 300 mg a day, that is six cups of tea, four of coffee or eight cans of cola.

8) Be cautious with cats. Toxoplasmosis may be present in soil grown veggies, undercooked meat and cat feces.

9) Wash veggies, cook your meat well and wear gloves with gardening or changing the cat litter.

10) Limit your intake of tuna. It’s a great source of protein but tinned tuna can contain mercury so limit your intake to 2 medium cans a week. Be aware that swordfish, marlin and shark may contain mercury too.

11) Avoid lying on your back after week 20 as this can leave you dizzy and nauseous due to the pressure of your womb on major blood vessels.

12) Sleep easy – some mums experience problems sleeping and find they wake frequently in the night as their pregnancy progresses. This could be Mother Nature’s way of acclimatising you to waking for those night feeds after baby is born.

13) Remember to take naps when you can. Practicing your relaxation and hypnosis techniques during the day will give you some much needed rest and re-energise you and can also be used to aid restful sleep during the night.

14) Practice relaxation: The same techniques that help you to rest and sleep during pregnancy will also assist you after baby is born; giving you an easy simple way to rest whilst baby sleeps.

15) Stop dieting. You’ll be depriving yourself and your growing baby of vital nutrients. Loosen your waistband and let baby grow.

16) Be animal aware. They may look cute but animals can carry a whole laboratory’s worth of bacteria. Always wash your hands after handling animals and steer clear of sheep at lambing as they can carry chlamydia, listeriosis and toxoplasmosis.

17) Get assessed at work. In the UK by law all employers mush carry out a risk assessment of your job to check your work won't harm your or your baby’s health. If the assessment shows that your job could be harmful, your employer must minimise the dangers. If you could still be at risk, they have to offer you alternative work.

18) Eat your greens. Eat plenty of green leafy vegetables; these are a good source of iron and vitamin K.

19) Travel with care. You are a greater risk from deep vein thrombosis in pregnancy so if you fly long haul, drink lots of water, walk about if possible, circle your ankles and flex your feet to keep your circulation going.

More detailed information on food and diet during pregnancy and breastfeeding can be found from the Food Standards Agency on line at www.food.gov.uk

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“The world is ruled by letting things take their course. It cannot be ruled by interfering” --Tao Te Ching

CHAPTER 2: Childbirth

Throughout pregnancy we are told to avoid taking unnecessary drugs. Mothers to be deciding to avoid medication, checking out the safety and side effects before deciding to take even an aspirin; and then in labour we are offered, almost encouraged, to take them. A veritable cocktail of substances are on offer and all you have to do is ask; yet no one mentions any possibilities of side effect from these drugs. We are told that drugs taken throughout pregnancy can affect the baby and the Merck on line medical library states that “Drugs taken by a pregnant woman reach the fetus primarily by crossing the placenta, the same route taken by oxygen and nutrients.” Surely this is the same route drugs taken in childbirth could take, and could be why some new born babies are not very alert; and could also explain why some new born babies are very grumpy and crying as they experience their first hang over.

In Sheila Kitzinger’s book Birth Crisis she says, “A newborn baby who has not been exposed to analgesia behaves differently from one who has”.

In a controlled study it was found that those babies whose mothers had used chemical anesthesia were less likely to suckle, had higher temperatures and cried more. They concluded “several types of analgesia given to the mother during labour may interfere with a newborns spontaneous breast-seeking and breastfeeding behaviours and increase the newborn’s temperature and crying.”

The Chapter on Managing the System covers the chemical anesthesia options available.

Dr. Grantly Dick Read was a doctor at Whitechapel Hospital, East London, in the early 1900’s, when he was called out to assist a woman in labour. He offered her chloroform, the only pain-relieving chemical available at the time, which she refused. Afterwards when he congratulated her on her bravery she replied, “It didn’t hurt. It wasn’t meant to was it Doctor?”

This comment spurred him on to investigate pain in childbirth and how some women managed to have an easy time where others did not.

Looking at the process of birth from an anthropologist’s point of view, we are mammals. Other mammals know instinctively how to give birth and care for their young. Cats and Dogs know when their time is near and they find a quiet, dark, comfortable, safe place to have their young. They do not appear to be in any discomfort. On watching a cat give birth she hardly made a sound. With her eyes glazed over whilst she gave birth almost as if her mind were elsewhere. Bears can have their offspring whilst asleep or hibernating. As the so called 'most evolved species', why do we need so much assistance? Or do we?

Our bodies work in the same way as other mammals, which is why scientists spend so much time studying other species. Hormones affect the mind and body in animals and there is no reason to suspect that we are any different. For example estrogen prepares the womb to receive the fertilised egg and prepares the muscles of the womb for labour. Hormones control our bodily functions and we are rarely aware of the automatic processes set in motion by our mind, regulating our immune system etc.

Instinctive behaviour comes not from conscious thought, but from our unconscious, also known as our subconscious mind. The unconscious mind could be described as a portion of the mind that is constantly influencing thoughts and behaviour and the processes that we are consciously unaware of. We know instinctively that our heart needs to continue beating and we need to breathe. We don’t have to think about it. It just happens. When our bodies need water we become thirsty; when we need food we become hungry. We receive a message; a thought comes to mind of what we need automatically. If we don’t listen to our bodies, the signal becomes stronger. For example I’m sure we have probably all experienced that 'I could eat a horse' feeling when ravenously hungry; then as soon as we have eaten enough the signal disappears.

Our mind is like a computer, constantly monitoring and scanning our bodies telling us what is needed to help keep us fit and healthy. It's when we stop listening that problems can arise. As soon as it finds any disruption in the system, this is analyzed. For example if you have a cold your mind sends out the necessary hormones (chemical NI) and signals your body to deal with the situation and thereby sending the necessary information to our consciousness self and telling us what is needed. In the case of a cold, sleep and perhaps increase your intake of liquids whilst your immune system deals with the bug. Our instincts send us signals telling us what we need to do. In today's culture we have learned to ignore these signals.

Most of our behaviour is learned from birth and we learn very early on to inhibit our instincts and to conform with our peers. Our very success as a species is due to our ability to behave for the benefit of the tribe or community through the pooling of our resources and sharing of knowledge. We are instinctively herd animals with a predisposition for approval from our peers. We thrive on this approval and most people find that without it they simply do not feel right.

Our very survival depends on a healthy body and learning to display the appropriate behaviour. Our behaviour is either instinctive or learned. Your mind has an enormous capacity to learn new behaviour.

Dr. Dick Read found that the pain in labour might have nothing to do with the design of our bodies. When we take the proper preparation our labour progresses as intended in the same way it does with the other inhabitants of this planet. By following his suggestions, using breathing techniques, relaxing and letting our bodies work naturally most women can have a pain free experience. Problems occur when labour starts with fear. Even though birth is safer today than before, and the circumstances that used to surround birth no longer exist, our belief in pain and suffering linger on. Fear is our self-fulfilling prophesy like a catch 22, pain is expected, fear is felt, the body tenses, stress hormones are released, and pain is felt.

Like a vicious circle, when women in labour are fearful or anxious, the adrenalin in the body increases which causes tension in the muscles and cervix which in turn causes painful contractions.

By using the techniques in this book you can break the circle and achieve a more relaxed natural birth.

Fear is the enemy of childbirth. When we are afraid we experience Stress.

STRESS

There seems to be a lot of emphasis on stress today and its effects on our health, almost as if the connection has just been discovered; yet centuries ago when someone was ill they were thought to be “dis eased”, it was believed that our lives influenced our health. And here we are in the 21st Century and just beginning to come to the same conclusion. Stress is now linked with various dis-eases yet although it can affect our health and general well-being in the long term stress starts out with the intention of enhancing our chances of survival; and we do need some stress to survive, Eustress, positive stress is what motivates us to succeed and makes us feel happy.

What is Eustress? Eustress is defined as a pleasant or curative stress. We can't always avoid stress, in fact, sometimes we don't want to. Often, it is the feeling of being stressed that gives us our competitive edge in performance related activities like athletics, giving a speech, or acting. Eustress is the type of feeling we have when excited about life; the excitement of a roller-coaster ride, a scary movie, or a fun challenge are all examples of eustress.

What is stress? No one passes through life without experiencing some stress in some form or another. From caveman times to present day each person has experienced their own stressful experiences; and even they will be different from person to person.

What initiates a stress reaction?

Stress is a primitive response; the brain thinks it recognises a danger and that thought sets off a chain reaction. Chemicals are released in your body that put your nervous system in high gear – ready for action. Your heart pumps faster, breathing accelerates to take in extra oxygen that’s needed for whatever response you take. This is called the fight or flight response. Centuries ago our ancestor the caveman would be ready to fight a saber tooth tiger or break the hundred meter dash! Whatever he decided to do he needed to draw on his physical resources. Many systems in his body would be ready for action. His reflexes are sharper – his blood will clot faster too so if he needed to fight he’d have a better chance of survival.

Our caveman would meet his stressor – the saber tooth tiger for example; adrenalin is produced – heart beats faster – breathing increases etcetera ready for action. Whatever action he took the physical exertion needed to either fight the tiger or run away to fight another day, would discharges the stress and burn up the adrenalin. His body then relaxes and everything goes back to normal.

Nowadays we rarely have to fight and most of the stressors are from modern day living; I’m sure we’ve all heard of the stress of highflying executives but stress can also appear when we feel underused and undervalued too. Under stimulation and boredom can also be very stressful. When we’re stressed we lose our sense of humour. Laughter releases the hormone endorphin which neutralises the effects of the stress hormone – adrenalin. So laughter really is the best medicine.

CAN STRESS AFFECT BIRTH?

EXERCISE:
Laugh even if you don’t feel like it. Force yourself to give a great big belly laugh. Even laughter that is forced will produce endorphins and give you a good feeling.

The start of labour is a gradual process as the cervix softens and stretches. The womb provides a safe environment for the growing baby and then when the time is right helps baby into the world. It is one of the most powerful muscles in the human body, undergoing changes through menstruation, pregnancy and birth and is influenced by more hormones than any other organ.

In 1920 it was discovered that adrenaline stopped contractions. Obstetricians experimented with it in an attempt to stop premature labour. As adrenaline is produced when we are stressed and afraid it's possible that stress can slow down or halt the birth process. Our hormones control Labour and the right mixture has to be present for labour to proceed. When we are afraid we experience stress and messages are sent to all the receptors in our body. These messages create a chemical change and stress hormones are released and the flight or fight response is activated. This creates the sensation many people call fear.

These sensations in the body, keep it in a state of alert, for our protection. When our bodies are in a state of alert it directs blood to organs that may need to react, the heart, arms and legs. To do this it restricts blood to other organs, including the womb causing the muscles in the womb and elsewhere to tense in preparation for whatever response may be necessary to deal with the situation. So instead of relaxing and opening, the fibers of the neck of the womb tighten. The muscles still continue to try and function but the cervix is tight and resistant.

Hormones and your nervous system control the muscles in the womb. When the time is right for baby to be born the muscles contract automatically and like other automated systems within the body, they are under the control of the unconscious mind. During birth the womb has two tasks to perform to push baby down and out and to ensure baby continues to receive life support from the placenta.

As well as causing pain, when tense muscles work in opposition they can effect you and/or the baby. As the muscles try to push the baby out, the cervix is unrelenting. When mum is fearful, whether consciously or unconsciously, she is tense, labour may be lengthened and pain could occurs.

By identifying emotional stress, how to release it and how to achieve a deeply relaxed state – you can be relaxed from the beginning of labour, so that any stress hormones are overridden by your body’s own natural relaxant – endorphins. Practicing relaxation techniques daily will allow the womb to remain in a relaxed state, leaving room for baby to maneuver during birth.

The suggestions in the hypnosis scripts for pregnancy in the chapter on Hypnosis will help you to achieve a calm relaxed state throughout birth.

EXERCISE:
RELEASING STRESS

Take a few deep slow breaths.

Stand Up

Imagine your strength comes from a point just below your naval

Focus on this point whilst you continue to breathe deeply and slowly

Imagine the energy from here flowing though your body as you begin to feel stronger and stronger – in more control.

Imagine the energy flowing up to the top of your head and all the way down to your toes, and then back up to the top of you head ................

Hold that feeling

Imagine the feeling growing stronger as the energy continues to flow through your body

Feel the tension and stress melting away

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“Nothing is ever good or bad only thinking makes it so”

From Hamlet by William Shakespeare

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Dr. Dick Read noticed when labouring mums were free of fear their bodies relaxed, the cervix relaxed and something happened that allowed an easier birth. Through relaxation and self-hypnosis techniques you can create a path to your unconscious and tap into your natural pain relief system, endorphins, stopping the stress hormones before they are released.

When my daughter was expecting my first grandchild, Joshua, she was so very calm at the prospect of giving birth. She couldn’t understand why some women liked to speak about the birth of their children as if it was a great feat of endurance. Some of my clients found other women’s stories scary whilst others felt they were almost surreal. A few said to me if the experience was truly as bad as indicated how is it that they had other children?

My clients who found these stories scary told me that it was as if they had a recording of these comments running around in their head on a continuous loop. Each one trying to outdo the last.

I suggested that they change the voices in their head, making them sound silly and even to exaggerate the stories then play the recording in their head. They found that by thinking of the stories this way it was impossible not to laugh.

Your imagination is extremely powerful and the area of the brain that you use to imagine something is the same area that is used when experiencing things; which is why your nervous system can’t tell the difference between a real or vividly imagined experience. Your feelings are created by the way you think of things.

Through relaxation and self-hypnosis techniques you can create a pathway to your unconscious mind

As human beings we experience ourselves and the world around us through our five senses; we represent those experiences in our mind using five internal senses.

When you think of something you may think in pictures and there are certain qualities to these images. For example think about what you did yesterday. As you do this you may be seeing yourself and what you did or possibly you are seeing what you did through your eyes as if you are doing it again. Maybe you’ll remember still images of what happened or review the day as if it were a movie.

We also hear internal sounds. When you remember what someone said to you, what a song sounds like or talk to yourself; as you are reading these words you may be thinking (hearing) the words in your head, these are examples of internal sounds. These sounds also have qualities such as tone, rhythm, volume and pitch.

How you think of a situation, what you are picturing in your mind and telling yourself creates your feelings.

Some of my clients tell me they are feeling stressed about giving birth; they say things like, “I just can’t see myself doing this. When I think of having my baby it's too large a task and I can’t see a way around it”.

When I ask them for more details about how they are representing this in their mind they usually have a huge picture that fills their head and stops them thinking of anything else. By changing the picture they are making in their mind they are able to change their feelings.

EXERCISE:
Banishing negative fears

1. Think of someone that annoys or irritates you.

You may find it easier to close your eyes whilst you do this. Notice how you are representing that person in your mind. What are you imagining? Do you have a colour picture? It is a movie or still picture? What size is it?

2. What sounds do you remember?

3. Hear them saying whatever it is that they say.

As you do notice the feeling that those words and that image creates in your body.

4. Now take that image, drain any colour out.

Make it black and white. If it's a movie, make it a still picture. Move it far away into the distance and make it much, much smaller.

5. Notice those sounds.

What they said only changes their voice; make it silly. What happens when they sound silly or like Mickey Mouse or Scooby Doo?

6. Notice that by making these changes you change the way you feel about them.

7. Now thinking of something else completely.

Maybe what you had for dinner last night; and think of that person again. You will still be feeling differently.

Now just as you can stop a thought that created bad feelings you can also improve those that create good feelings.

1. Think of a time you felt really good.

2. Imagine that time in vivid detail.

See the image clearly, hear the sounds loudly and remember those feelings.

3. Now imagine stepping into this memory as if it's happening now.

See what you saw, hear what you hear and feel how good you feel.

4. Notice that feeling.

Get a sense of whereabouts it is in your body. Where does it start? How does it move? Imagine having control of that feeling and moving it faster and faster throughout your body. The faster it moves the stronger the feeling.

5. Now when in the future can you use these good feelings?

Spin them through your body as you think about the months to come when you can utilise these good feelings.

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These very simple techniques have come from the work of Dr. Richard Bandler. Back in the 1970’s along with John Grinder, Dr. Bandler originated the idea that people build mental images, and he discovered that by changing those images you changed the way that you felt.

What is it that makes us think something as natural as Childbirth should be painful? Strange, isn’t it – the one thing that we are supposed to be able to do – procreate – should be so difficult, or is it? For centuries women have expected and been expected to go through agony during birth; and where pain is expected, pain is experienced.

The belief that pain accompanies labour has been bestowed upon us. From when we were young – just old enough to understand, girls learn from their families that childbirth is painful. Even positive thinking mums find helpful women prepared to give them advice on what to watch out for. They may well have the best intentions at heart, but their message is received loud and clear “be afraid, be scared”. It was not always this way, women in other cultures with bodies identical to those of Western women will give birth and go straight back to work afterwards.

If we look back in history to around 3000 years before the birth of Christ women had their babies naturally. It's true they didn’t have the drugs that we have today. These people’s lives were centred on nature and motherhood, worshiping Mother Nature, Mother Earth and Mother Creator. Women were revered as the givers of life. When women gave birth everyone gathered around her in the temple to celebrate life and ask their God(s) to bless the child. Birth was a religious rite and not the painful ordeal it later became. Women were the nurturers and healers. All healing being provided by the women while men were the hunters and gatherers of food and the builders.

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BIRTH STORY

Dear Tina

“Just wanted to drop you a note to thank you for your helping to make the birth of my baby a calm, relaxing natural one. Even though it didn’t quite go as expected I achieved a natural birthing free from pain relief.

Once my contractions started, Jan (my birth partner) and I stayed up all night listening to the CDs and timing the contractions (they were between 4 and 6 minutes).

It felt like the head was coming when I went to the loo at 6am! Dean (my husband) drove us to the hospital. I was examined and told I was 8 cm dilated. The midwives were great.

All was going well until the midwife started to talk about breaking my waters to hurry the process along. I think I’d been holding back as I was not sure when I was allowed to push or what was happening to my body. I really didn’t want anything to interfere with our natural birthing experience. She examined me and I started to relax, cervix began to open and my waters naturally broke.

I really started to work with my body to relax and open. I used the birthing ball to rock and sway to the contractions and then afterwards to lean over it while on all fours for 2nd stage. All the while a lady 2 doors down was screaming and I wondered what stage she was at!

Midwife suggested that I sit on the toilet as that’s a wonderful position to help the baby down within a short time, (about half an hour – 45 min.) I felt the head crowning but the midwife said it was too soon. She had a feel and was in disbelief that the head was there and that it happened so well/soon. It took 4 more contractions/pushes before baby was born.

Henry didn’t cry as he was weighed 8 lbs. 13 oz. he was so calm from the natural birth.

All in all I am so pleased that I was able to give birth naturally.

Thanks again Tina,” --Julie

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Studies of documents written by the Greek scholars Hippocrates and Aristotle give no indication of any discomfort in childbirth, unless there was a problem. At that time if they needed assistance they were brought into a relaxed state, sometimes using herbs and potions, so that the problem could be dealt with. They believed that whilst women were giving birth their feelings should be accommodated and that mum needed people around to attend to her. Hippocrates was the first person to run childbirth classes for midwives. Both Hippocrates and Aristotle wrote that nature is the best physician and that it (nature) should be allowed to function without any interference. Aristotle wrote of a mind body connection during childbirth and emphasised the importance of a deep relaxed state. Neither mentioned pain in their detailed studies.

Another Grecian scholar, Soranus, began putting the writings of Hippocrates and Aristotle into book form. His writing earned him the reputation of being the greatest obstetrical authority of the time. He stressed the importance of listening to the needs of the mother and suggested using the power of the mind to achieve the relaxed state needed for an easy birth.

People’s perception of birth at this time was taken from the Bible. Yet in the Hebrew Scriptures where the Old Testament stories came from it uses the word ECZEV which translates to mean labour, toil and work. Yet in the Christian translation of these stories it is given to mean pain, sorrow, and anguish. The prophets make no such claims in their writing on childbirth.

Childbirth can be a time of activity, concentration and confidence. In this day and age most women have their babies in hospital yet you are not sick and should not be treated as though you were.

HOW THOUGHTS AFFECT REALITY

When I was expecting my daughter I read everything I could about birth and felt that something must be wrong with the human race – why do we need so much assistance? I thought of other mammals who have their babies quietly and without any sign of pain and bears who have their babies whilst hibernating. Was there such a serious design fault with humans? Then at my doctor’s check up, just a couple of weeks before my due date, I was told I was in labour. But it doesn’t hurt I said. “It will,” said my GP. I spent the next few hours looking for and wondering about this pain I was to feel. Nothing happened. I went shopping, then as the feelings I had been having became more regular I went to hospital. “Do you want anything for the pain?” I was asked. And when I replied it didn’t hurt I was told, “It will”. The nurses were very helpful asking regularly about my pains and offering drugs. After a while I actually began to wonder when it would start to hurt.

One of the presuppositions of Neuro-Linguistic Programming is that mind and body are interconnected. The implication for health is obvious; in order for our body to be well our mind needs to be well. When our mind is unwell, when we are stressed or anxious this is often the time when we are more prone to illness or accidents. Stress and anxiety are not just something that happens to us, something outside of our control – although many people may feel that it is. Anxiety and stress are connected to how we react to what happens to us, something that is within our control. How we react depends on how we think about a situation. Our thoughts either encourage us to respond resourcefully or sabotage our efforts thus leaving us less able to cope.

Many of our beliefs are connected to expectancy. For example if you don’t believe that your outcome is possible, or you don’t believe that you have what it takes to achieve your goal – you probably wont do what it takes to achieve it. Everything we say or think about ourselves we make happen. How often do we say things like “that was stupid of me”,” I don’t have any talent” or “Things always go wrong” and then wonder why these things happen to us.

Pregnant women are both vulnerable and suggestible and can be greatly affected by thoughtless remarks, especially from people who delight in dramatising their own labours. I have known many who have been worried by comments from medical professionals; and well meaning friends and family; especially by comments made on the size of the baby or about how difficult labour can be. Most completely unaware of just how suggestible the mum to be could be. Earlier you learned that by changing the way that you think of a particular person and/or event, that is changing what you were picturing in your mind and or changing the words that you were thinking, you could change the way that you feel.

EXERCISE:
Excise Limiting Beliefs

Another great exercise that you can do to change those thoughts, limiting beliefs, you may have concerning the birth.

1. Think of the limiting belief you want to get rid of.

For example, the belief that you will not be able to have the birth experience you want.

2. Picture that in you mind.

What are you imagining? Do you have a colour picture? It is a movie or still picture? What size is it? Is it in colour? Are there any sounds connected to this picture? If so notice what they are.

3. Now put that thought to one side and begin to design what you want instead.

What would you look like if you were already in control of your destiny, if you had the necessary resources that will enable you to have the birth you want?

4. Make this image completely compelling and irresistible.

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