EVERYBODY vs THE FERRET: 2
by
Cristian YoungMiller
RateABull
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Published By:
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Published by RateABull Publishing at Smashwords
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Smashwords Edition, License Notes
This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each person. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.
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The characters and events in this book are fictitious. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author.
Copyright © 2011 by Cristian YoungMiller
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without permission in writing from the publisher, except by a reviewer who may quote brief passages in a review. For information contact Cristian YoungMiller at RateABull@gmail.com.
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Dedication:
This book is dedicated to everybody who has focused their life around how they look.
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Table of Contents
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EVERYBODY vs THE FERRET: 2
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Chapter 1
Candy reaches up her sweaty, dusty hand toward the next crevice in the cliff face. With her strawberry head pressed against the rock, her reaching hand slips off the crumbling crack and she watches the pebbles fall a thousand feet. Shaking off her near death, she continues on knowing that her shadowy contact waits for her above. ‘Soon,’ she thinks, ‘I will get the answer to the question that consumes me most: How to rule the school.’
Cresting the top of the cliff, Candy brushes her leaf hair out of her face. In front of her stands a ferret-shaped figure in a hood and cloak. Candy isn’t sure if this is her contact, but pulling herself onto the plateau, she doesn’t see anyone else. ‘This has to be him,’ Candy thinks.
“Do you have something for me?” Candy asks with the constrained excitement of a 10 year old bent on school domination.
“Yes, it’s right here,” the shadowy figure says in a slow, androgynous southern drawl.
The ferret-shaped figure pulls a large envelope out of his cloak. Candy snatches the envelope out of her contact’s hand and, too curious to wait, she tears the manila paper open and reads the file inside.
“Yes, yes!” Candy proclaims.
Candy turns toward Miller’s Grove Elementary, the school that is a thousand feet below and a mile away. “Do you hear me? With this information there is no one that will be able to resist me. And once and for all I will finally rule the school.” Candy lets out a laugh that is one evil hair short of a Bond villain.
The ferret-shaped figure watches quietly until Candy stops laughing. “Did you know that laughter was once used as a cure for science-induced madness? They stopped using it when it became known as the ‘mad scientist laugh.’ They next tried cats.”
Coming to her senses, she turns back to the figure. “Thank you for this. When my rule begins, I will remember what you did. But I have to know, why did you want to meet here?” Candy asks, feeling bolder now that she has what she came for.
“Did you know that there is a mini-mall across the street?” the shadowy figure replies.
Candy looks past her contact at the strip mall packed with cars. “Oh,” she says, a little embarrassed.
The ferret leans in to Candy and whispers loudly, “Did you know that the cloak store in there takes back purchases without receipts? I bought this cloak at another store. I think it makes me look fat.”
The ferret leans back and speaks in a normal voice. “Hey you want to go clothes shopping with me. First I’ll try something on and you can tell me how skinny I look in it. Then you can try something on and I’ll be like ‘Girl, you’re so skinny, you practically disappear.’”
“No thanks,” Candy says, walking toward the edge of the cliff. “My mom’s waiting for me below.”
“Did you know the Number 2 bus leaves for town every 10 minutes?”
“That’s OK. I have my own way down.”
Candy turns, tucks the envelope within the straps on her chest and laughs wildly. She then runs toward the cliff and jumps off.
The ferret watches as Candy disappears below. He walks a few steps towards the edge and then jumps back when a gliding parachute rockets up over the cliff’s edge. James Bond theme music plays from an mp3 player strapped around Candy’s shoulder. The music trails off as the ferret watches Candy sail away. The ferret is pleased.
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Chapter 2
Candy enters the basement of her home which also doubles as the girl’s clubhouse and military lair. Tia, Candy’s Asian pear-headed friend, leans over the 3D holographic topographical display table that still shows Candy’s route up the cliff face. Tia adjusts the neck of her burnt-orange baby doll dress and stands when Candy walks in.
Molly, Candy’s raspberry-headed right hand, turns from admiring the ‘Hang in There’ poster with the kitty-cat wearing a helmet. When Molly sees Candy pull out a manila envelope from her backpack, she walks over.
“Ladies, I have it,” Candy says, addressing her two troops. “I have in my hand the secret which has alluded us for so long. I have the Marilyn file.”
“What’s the Marilyn file?” Tia asks, looking at Molly.
Candy pulls Tia’s attention back to her. “Legend has it that there was once a sorceress named Marilyn, and in spite of the fact that she was a little chunky by today’s standards, she used her magical power to enslave the world. Presidents fell to their knees in front of her. And even today the name Marilyn Monroe strikes fear into the hearts of world leaders everywhere. Their fear is that one day she may walk the earth again and this time rule the world forever.”
“Ladies, this file,” Candy holds up the envelope, “contains the secret to her power.”
“If it’s so powerful, should we be messing with it?” Tia asks.
“Tia, the tide of the world turns on providence and destiny. And if the universe has chosen us to be its vessel, who are we to turn our backs?” Candy concludes.
Molly interjects, “Can we see it?”
Candy looks at Molly and then walks over to the holographic table. She hits a button and makes the cliff face image disappear. Candy then pulls the file from the envelope, opens it and places it on a lighted part of the table. The words of the file appear as a hologram in front of the girls.
Tia reads: “Over the boys you will rule; if your bra you will lose.” Tia turns to Candy. “What does that mean?”
Molly answers, “I think it means that if we go braless, we will gain some sort of magical power.”
“Exactly,” Candy says with an excited look in her eyes. “If we go braless, we will gain a magical power that will allow us to control the minds of the boys around us. And if we do that, we will rule the school.” Candy lets out a mad scientist laugh. The other girls wait for her to finish.
“But I don’t wear a bra,” Tia admits unapologetically.
“Neither do I,” Molly adds.
“And neither do I, girls,” Candy concludes. “Which is why I brought these.” Candy retrieves her backpack from the foot of the table where she placed it. From within, she pulls out a handful of braziers. “Bras, ladies.”
Tia and Molly take the backpack from Candy and dig through the undergarments.
“They’re so beautiful,” Molly says, awed by their majesty.
“What I think we have to do is put them on, wait a few minutes and then take them off,” Candy explains.
“And that will give us magical powers?” Tia asks doubtfully.
“‘Over the boys you will rule, if your bra you will lose.’ That’s what the secret file said,” Candy exclaims.
“I don’t want to control the minds of all of the boys,” Tia announces as she returns the colorful bras to the bag.
“It’s because she likes Billy,” Molly says to Candy.
“I don’t like Billy,” Tia protests. “It’s just that I think he’s dreamy and smells like gumballs and rainbows,” Tia says, now lost in the thought of her apple-headed crush.
“Well think of it this way, Tia, wouldn’t you like him to show you the same attention that you give him?” Candy asks.
Tia’s thoughts turn back to reality. She stops smiling.
“Wouldn’t you like Billy to come over to you for once, instead of you following him around?”
“I don’t follow him around. And, yes, I would,” Tia says conclusively.
Candy reaches in the bag and pulls out a fist full of braziers. “With these, Tia, you could make that happen.”
Tia looks at all of the pretty underwear in Candy’s hand and can no longer resist. “Let’s do it.”
Candy smiles. “Pick your bra, girls.”
Molly chooses a yellow one that matches the yellow flowers on her aqua dress. Tia chooses a pink one that matches the pink trim on her dress. And Candy chooses a red bra that matches the polka dots on her dress.
“Are you ready, ladies?” Candy enquires.
The other two girls nod their head nervously.
“Put them on.”
All three girls look down at their braziers and, as if from a distant genetic memory, immediately know how to put the undergarment on. In a second, they have the bras clasped over their clothes. They then spin them around their bodies and slip their hands through the loops. The bras are now on.
All three girls look at each other in nervous anticipation of something that never comes.
“I don’t feel anything,” Tia says.
“Me neither,” Molly adds.
“I think,” Candy pauses. “I don’t think we’ll feel anything until we take them off.”
“So when do we take it off?” Tia asks with her arms floating uncomfortably in the air, not wanting the tender skin of her arms to touch the source of such power.
“I don’t want to take it off. This feels good,” Molly explains while she adjusts her overly developed 10-year-old body to more comfortably rest in the cups. “It feels right.”
“I’m not sure when we take it off.” Candy looks at Tia who stares blankly back. “But that’s got to be long enough, right?”
“I guess,” Tia agrees hesitantly.
“OK, let’s take them off now.”
“Ohhh,” Molly sighs disappointedly.
One by one the girls take off their bras. They all examine their bodies for any sign of change. Nothing’s changed.
“Maybe we were supposed to keep them on longer,” Tia says. But before Tia can say anything else she is overwhelmed by a sensation that she has never had before. Tia breathes in the magic. “I can feel it!”
“That’s strange because I don’t feel anything,” Candy begins to say before she too feels the power. “Wait, I can feel it too. I can feel it rushing through me.”
Molly takes a deep breath in when she feels it as well. “It’s like little Barbies dancing all over my body.”
Candy looks at the other girls who are mesmerized by what they’re feeling. “Girls, we have it. Now we rule.”
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